


Move in with me

by GoForGoals



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Best Friends, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Dorks in Love, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hand Jobs, Kissing, M/M, Neck Kissing, bravertz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2020-12-16 02:10:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 28,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21028547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoForGoals/pseuds/GoForGoals
Summary: Julian misses Kai after he left Leverkusen. But then he has an idea that might seem ridiculous at first - but that turns his entire world upside down.





	1. A ridiculous idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, this is my first attempt to write Bravertz - I hope that you’ll enjoy it! Feedback is always very welcome. :-)

"I hate that we see each other so seldom since you left." Kai’s face is a defiant mask, barely hiding his frustration and anger.

Every word of his accusation hurts Julian to the bones. "I know," is all that he replies. He doesn’t want to ruin the joy of seeing Kai again and he doesn’t want the other members of the national team to listen to them. This is something between them. Only them.

"At least we have some days together now," Kai sighs. "You look good, by the way. A bit pale maybe."

Julian still feels the aftermath of their welcome hug, of Kai’s arms wrapped so tightly around him.

Kai will never be more than a friend to him and that’s what hurts the most.

***

They fall into their usual friendship mode rapidly fast. Every training session, every hour spent with Kai is so intense that Julian starts to regret his decision. Over and over again he tells himself that he has left Leverkusen for a reason. He’s with a strong team now, even if they are struggling, and he doesn’t have to endure Kai’s presence each and every single day during the season.

And still.

He misses him like mad, he misses his jokes, his hugs, his teasing. The days with the national team show Julian what he has lost until he can barely take it any longer.

By the time he has to leave the team, by the time he has to leave Kai, Julian takes an utterly insane decision.

***

"Kai? Do you have a minute?" Julian’s voice sounds unfamiliar in his ears, he can’t deal with his own seriousness.

This is Kai of all people, his best friend.

The man he loves more than anything in the world.

"Hey, what’s up?" Kai asks casually, nudging Marco out of the way.

"Well, I want to tell you something," Julian rambles.

"I’m listening?" Kai replies, raising his eyebrows.

Julian takes deep breaths to get that damn dizziness out of his head. "Not here," he adds like a spy in a lame movie.

Kai tilts his head to the side and shoots him a strange glance. "Are you okay?" he wants to know, wrapping his arm around Julian’s waist. "Come on, I’ll bring you to your room."

Being alone with Kai doesn’t make anything better, on the contrary. Kai throws himself on Julian’s bed, kicking his shoes from his feet. He ignores the mess in Julian’s room, caused by just another sleepless night.

"I…" Julian starts, his mouth suddenly running dry. This is ridiculous, completely ridiculous.

"Spill it out," Kai encourages him, his hand ruffling his dark brown hair. Julian wants nothing more than to restore that hairdo with his own fingers.

Finally, Julian sits down on a chair, facing the wall. He better tells Kai about his plan right here and there, just to be through with it. "I want to buy a flat," he says, only then realizing that he has started with the point that is the least important.

"Cool," Kai replies, of course not getting what Julian wants to say.

"For us."

The words come out of Julian’s mouth by their own and his eyes widen in shock. Now that was rather the sledgehammer approach.

"What?" Kai sits up, about to get to his feet, but Julian tries to stop him with more words. Hastily spoken words.

"I thought that we could have a flat between Leverkusen and Dortmund, where we can hang out or gamble, just the two of us. We could both have an own room and we could meet there whenever we have some time off. Like… a shared apartment. Among friends."

"A shared apartment. Among friends," Kai echoes before he comes to a conclusion. "Are you homesick, Jule?"

"Shit, I’m not. Forget it," Julian mutters, taking a heart. "I just miss you", he adds tonelessly. "I’m an idiot, am I not?"

"Yeah, you are," Kai confirms, finally getting up. „And you will remain an idiot, unless I get the biggest room in our flat."


	2. A perfect flat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, thank you for your comments and kudos! As the story continues, feedback is still very welcome. :-)

During the next weeks, Julian uses every free minute to search for a proper flat. He pretends that he won’t regret it, that flats are always a good investment. That’s at least what the bank managers keep telling football players, he thinks.

Finally, he finds the property. The flat is brand-new, with four rooms, two bathrooms and a spectacular view out in the open. He doesn’t tell Kai anything before he buys the flat and he doesn’t tell him afterwards, while he chooses the furniture for them. He knows Kai, he knows that he will for sure appreciate the fact that he comes into a fully furnished apartment.

_If_ he comes, that is.

The biggest room is of course Kai’s. Julian even buys some wooden letters and puts them onto the door. "KAI" is written over the surface and Julian starts to sway a bit.

He really did it.

He left Dortmund and he bought a flat for Kai and for him, somewhere between Leverkusen and Dortmund. Closer to Leverkusen, to be precise, because Kai shouldn’t drive too long to come here.

When everything is set and done, including two large and comfortable beds Julian cannot look at without feeling a ridiculous amount of hope, he texts his friend. Then, in a rush of romanticism, he puts Kai’s key for the flat into an envelope and sends it to him, together with the address of the flat.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Watch out for your letter post", Julian simply texts. He earns some confused emojis in response but doesn’t write more although he wants to blurt out preferably everything. He hopes that the postman is quick and that Kai would have the key in the next 48 hours.

However, Julian has no clue what will happen then.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Kai doesn’t answer him the next day and not the day that follows. Julian’s despair grows bit by bit and in the end, he flees from the training ground right after they finished another session, gets into his car and drives to their flat.

He needs a place now where he can be alone, where he can let his frustration - and probably his tears - out. He’s all of a sudden sure that Kai will never join him in the flat, of course not. What a fool he has been. Defiantly, Julian swears to himself that he will cherish the flat no matter what. Maybe he can come here whenever things in Dortmund go worse.

After driving less than an hour, Julian arrives at the parking garage. He leaves his car and takes the elevator to the penthouse. To _his_ penthouse. The first thing he would do is to scratch off Kai’s name from his room. How stupid he has been. Full of self-pity, Julian opens the door to his flat. He closes it carefully and takes a deep breath. Once again, he is stunned how beautiful the flat is. He puts away his shoes and his jacket and enters the kitchen to brew a cup of tea.

For a moment, Julian hesitates because he is not quite sure if he has left a glass on the table the last time he has been here. But then he just shakes his head, annoyed about his own confusion. With the tea in his hand, Julian strolls around in the flat, savoring the quiet, peaceful atmosphere. He walks over to his room but decides otherwise, stepping right in front of Kai’s door. His fingers travel over the wooden letters of Kai’s name, his very own alphabet.

Lost in his thoughts, Julian nearly gets a heart-attack when he hears a crackling sound. He holds his breath just to hear the same sound again. Scared to death, Julian opens the door to Kai’s room - just to find Kai inside.

"You god damn idiot, what are you doing here!" Julian yells in shock and in surprise.

Kai grins at him sleepily and says a sentence that throws Julian completely off the track. "Well, I guess I live here, Jule."

Julian’s hands tremble so much that he spills some of his tea. Kai comes closer and takes the cup out of his hands, putting it away. "The flat is stunning," he says, tugging Julian into his embrace. "Thank you. Especially because my room is indeed the biggest one!" Kai laughs now, showing his blinding smile.

"Since when are you here?" Julian manages to say. "Why didn’t you text me!"

"You didn’t text me either, did you?" Kai answers. "And I had enough time to take a closer look around before I took a nap. You even bought a Playstation!"

"Just to kick your ass on Fifa." Slowly, Julian gains his composure back. "How long can you stay?"

Kai looks at his watch. "Only three hours. But I have two days off next week, just like you probably? Maybe we can meet here and stay overnight? That would be fun, wouldn’t it?" Kai is still all smiles. "I cannot wait to sleep properly here. What about you?"

"Same," Julian mutters, "same." He feels hot and cold all at once, starved and over-stimulated, Kai’s closeness infecting all of his senses.

"We should start the first round of Fifa right away," Kai means. "That couch in the living room looks very enticing!"

"Yes, it does," Julian replies. He cannot avert his gaze from Kai, here in his room, shining in all of his angelic glory.

Stretching his long and elegant legs, Kai casually walks over to the living room, starting the Playstation. "Can I use your character?" he asks Julian.

"You can have everything from me, Kai," Julian murmurs. "Even my Fifa character."

Kai furrows his brows but he doesn’t reply. Instead, he chooses his team, waiting for Julian to do the same.

Without asking, Julian includes Kai into his team, some Leverkusen players and others from the national team. When he chooses Marco, Kai snorts. "You like him, don’t you? Kind of a role model, isn’t he?"

Julian glances at Kai perplexed. "Yeah, of course. He’s the best player in my team and I can learn a lot from him. Why do you ask?"

"What do you mean with ‚I can learn a lot from him‘?" Kai replies with another question.

"He has a lot of experience," Julian starts but he doesn’t come further because Kai starts to cough vehemently. "Wait, I’ll bring you a bottle of water from the fridge."

They don’t talk about Marco anymore when Julian returns, soon engaged in a vivid Fifa match. "Hey, you scored with me!" Kai shouts delighted, "I’m a beast on the pitch."

For the first time in the afternoon, Julian laughs too. "Only on the pitch?"

Kai grins mischievously. "I’ll guess you’ll have to find that out!" he says, winking at Julian who feels another surge of adrenaline flowing through him.

They finish the match in silence, each of them dwelling in their thoughts. "See, Marco didn’t even score!" Kai eventually mutters, putting away the controller.

Julian doesn’t quite understand what Kai’s problem with Marco is, but he decides to better not mention him again. Instead, he glimpses at his watch. "You’ll have to leave soon?" he asks, not hiding the regret in his voice.

"Yeah. There’s a team talk this evening," Kai says. "But we have a date next week, don’t you forget about that!"

Julian nearly faints when he hears the word "date" but he nods eagerly. "I’ll be there. Maybe we can watch some Netflix episodes?"  
  
"You bet we can!" Kai replies. "And I will take care of the food."

Against his will, Julian has to chuckle. "That means that you’ll call the pizza service?"

"Take pot luck," Kai says mysteriously. Then, he grabs his shoes from his room and embraces his friend. "Thank you again, Jule, for everything. I cannot wait to see you again. This place already feels like home."

Julian senses a huge lump in his throat. "Yes it does. Thank you for coming here.“ Their goodbye hug lasts even longer than before until Kai finally slips out of the door.

The emptiness he leaves behind is so suffocating that Julian opens a window before he hesitantly returns to Kai’s room. There, he lets himself fall onto his bed, breathing in Kai’s unique scent. "Until next week," Julian whispers, already counting the hours until he can meet the love of his life again.


	3. A promising evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, this is a longer update - please enjoy! :-)

This time, Julian makes sure that he is in the flat before Kai arrives. He drives to his penthouse long before their date. Opening the door still feels thrilling, especially with the prospect of spending almost two days with Kai here.

Julian looks around in his property, savoring each and every detail. Suddenly he sees something that hasn’t been there before. With a beating heart, he walks over to his room, spotting the brand-new signage. "JULE" is written at the door in bright letters which means that Kai must have been here in the meantime.

Gently, Julian nudges his forehead against the letters, praying inwardly that he did the right thing. Buying this flat, spending time with Kai.

Increasing his heartache.

One hour before their date - time that Julian uses to shower extensively - he hears that Kai puts his key into the lock. "Damn it, that’s heavy," Kai complains from the outside and Julian hears that he puts some items onto the floor with a loud bang. Finally, Kai manages to open the door.

"Hey," Julian welcomes him, leaning against the doorframe so that he has something that keeps him in balance while he waits for Kai to greet him.

"Jule!" Kai exclaims surprised, a large bag hanging over his shoulder. He lets the bag fall and embraces Julian. "Can you help me to carry the boxes inside?"

Julian’s eyes grow big. "What did you bring here?" he wonders, taking a glimpse into the hallway.

"Well…", Kai drawls, "to be honest, I bought some food."

"Some?!" Julian asks, seeing two huge boxes with noodles, vegetables, fruits, cans and other groceries standing outside. "How were you even able to carry that?!"

"I’m strong," Kai answers proudly, flexing his biceps.

Julian lifts a box from the ground, savoring the scent of the vegetables and the fruits. "Wait," he states, "does that mean…"

Kai grins at him, closing the door and bringing the box into the kitchen. "No pizza service, Jule. We will cook together!"

Julian stares at Kai, not sure if he has understood him correctly. "You want to cook. You of all people."

Kai pulls a face. "I thought that it is a good idea but I can still call the pizza service."

Punching him in the side, Julian chuckles. "No, I’d love to cook with you, that’s going to be hilarious. Which recipe did you choose?"

Kai hesitates. "Eh… I didn’t really choose a receipt. I just bought what looked good to me and thought that we can make something out of it?"

"Strawberry noodles with an orange-bean sauce for example?" Julian replies, putting the content out of the box. "Hell, you even bought an enormous white cabbage?"

"Oh, so that’s a white cabbage," Kai murmurs embarrassedly.

Julian laughs. "Don’t worry, we’ll find a receipt that will fit to your …extraordinary choice." Then, something comes up his mind and he sighs. "But we don’t have any pots or pans," he admits sheepishly. "I just bought some tableware."

Kai smiles at him, his eyes sparkling. "Open the cupboards," he orders and when Julian does, he lets out a stunned sound.

"You got everything we need!" Julian beams, his eyes and fingers traveling over the cookware Kai must have bought.

"I wanted to make a contribution," Kai replies. "Listen, Jule, if you want to have some money for the flat…"

"No!" Julian interrupts him. "I just want… your presence here."  
  
"You’re crazy," Kai answers touched, "and I like it."

There’s silence until Julian takes the cabbage and throws it to Kai. "Here, what do we do with it? Should we try to find a recipe?"

Kai catches the cabbage safely, of course he does. "That’s a great idea," he states, taking his mobile and searching for a meal they could cook.

"By the way, Kai, did you buy anything else, other than the cookware? And this lovely letters at my door?"

Kai lets his mobile drop but he doesn’t give an answer immediately. "Just some things for my bathroom," he eventually murmurs. "You know, shower gel …and so on."

Julian thinks that there is something weird about Kai’s answer but he doesn’t say anything, grabbing a package of noodles instead. "What about spaghetti with tomatoes and vegetables? You bought tomatoes, didn’t you?"

Kai gazes at him underneath his long eyelashes. "I guess I bought every vegetable I found?"

Julian chuckles. "I think so. Okay, we need tomatoes, onions, zucchini and eggplants."

"Do you know how to make a sauce out of it?" Kai asks with open admiration.  
  
"No, I don’t. But it can’t be that difficult. I think we should chop everything into small pieces first."

"Aye, aye," Kai replies, taking a zucchini and cutting it dedicatedly. He’s such a catch for the eye, looking so focussed and so young at the same time. To distract himself, Julian takes an onion and starts to slice it, tears running over his face almost instantly.  
  
"Hand the onions to me," Kai orders, "I cannot see you crying."

"Idiot," Julian mumbles, putting the onion rings into a pot.

"Hey, I meant it!" Kai states. He steps closer and wipes away the traces of Julian’s tears so gently that Julian’s breath falters. "That’s better," Kai says, satisfied with himself.

Julian however needs some moments until he has himself under control again. Unceremoniously, he throws the rest of the vegetables into the pot.

"Do you think that will work?" Kai asks, doubt clearly written all over his face.  
  
"No," Julian states dryly, "but at least we tried." He puts water into another pot and starts to heat it. "When it’s boiling, we can insert the noodles", he declares.

Kai whistles, treating their attempt-of-a-sauce with the cooking spoon and increasing the temperature of the cooker. Suddenly, a splash of the sauce lands on his shirt. "Shit, that’s tomato," he says, "do we have a washing machine somewhere?"

"Not yet," Julian answers, "but that’s a good point."  
  
"What do I do then?" Kai muses, "that’s my favorite shirt. Maybe it will help to soak the stain in the water basin?" No sooner said than done, he undresses his shirt, revealing his toned chest. Julian holds his breath, trying not to stare.  
  
"You’re staring," Kai winks at him before he disappears into his bathroom, letting the water flow there.

Julian hastily grabs a glass and pours some juice into it, gulping it down in large sips. He hasn’t seen Kai half-naked in a while and the sight he got lets the blood boil in his veins. He’s hot, so hot.  
  
Kai returns with a fresh shirt that accentuates his athletic appearance even more. "Are you hungry, Jule?" he asks.

"Yes!" Julian says louder than planned, repeating a quieter "yes" when he remembers that Kai is talking about the food and not about himself.

Finally, their dinner is ready. The noodles look good, but the sauce is a mess. "Did you buy ketchup?" Julian wants to know, rummaging through the cupboard. "Ah, here we go. That will do."

Kai doesn’t respond because he is apparently musing about something. "We need cook books in the future," he says, setting the table.

"Are you planning to become a master chef or what?" Julian laughs.

"I rather thought that you would take over that part?" Kai replies innocently.  
  
"My part is to choose the series we will watch after our superb meal here", Julian replies, starting to eat his noodles with ketchup. However, Kai somehow looks disappointed after that answer. "But yes, I would really like to cook here more often."

"With me?" Kai asks carefully.

"Of course! I didn’t tell anybody about the flat here."

"Not even…" Kai gazes at his fork, "eh, one of your team mates?"

"Why should I?" Julian answers perplexed.

"Forget it," Kai continues to eat, "what should we watch after our dinner?"

"Maybe a cooking show?" Julian suggests.

"We shouldn’t overdo," Kai grins. "There’s this new Amazon series, what about that?"

Julian puts his cutlery aside. "You’re not talking about ‚Inside BVB‘, I hope."

Kai’s mood darkens. "Naaah," he mutters, "that’s too much… black and yellow." He helps Julian to fill the dish washer. When they are done, they walk over to the living room. "Now which one is your side?" Kai asks.

"What do you mean?"  
  
"Which side of the couch of course. I think you should have a certain side to lie onto. I’ll take the other then."

Julian grins, then he takes a run and tries to jumps onto the sofa. Kai however is faster and wraps his arms around him, holding him in place. "That’s unfair!" Julian complains but he laughs triumphantly when he manages to get a grip on Kai as well. They fall onto the couch in a heap of legs and arms and hair and bodies, still playfully wrestling with each other. "That’s my side," Julian pants breathlessly, throwing himself onto the left side of the couch.  
  
"Fine, then I’ll take the other one," Kai answers, his cheeks rosy from their little fight. "Now who gets the remote control?"

It doesn’t take long until they tussle with each other for the device, with Kai winning in the end. He holds the remote control into the air like a trophy. "That’s just because you are bigger!" Julian pouts.

"Is that so," Kai rasps, the atmosphere between them suddenly changing. Kai slowly lets his arm drop, handing the remote control to Julian. "Here, little one," he says, the name spoken like a caress.

"Thank you," Julian whispers, drowning in Kai’s eyes, the closeness overwhelming him just another time.

"Jule…" Kai starts, his breath ghosting over Julian’s face.

Both of them don’t make the slightest move until Julian lets the remote control drop by accident. He hates himself for his clumsiness that ruins the mood abruptly.

"So Amazon is it, then," Julian murmurs, bending down to take the device and to switch the television on.

They choose a thrilling new series, making themselves comfortable. Miraculously, there is a cozy blanket that covers them both, their feet touching underneath it. "I could stay like this forever," Kai sighs.

Julian smiles melancholically at him. "Me too."

They watch one episode of the series, then a second and a third. In the middle of the fourth, Julian realizes that Kai has fallen asleep. Cautiously he stands up, spreading the blanket over his friend. "Sleep tight," he whispers, not able to avert his gaze from Kai’s handsome face, "you’re my home, Kai."


	4. A good morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, here’s another update - I hope that you will enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! :-)

Julian awakes the next morning in his bed to the scent of freshly brewed coffee. He needs a short moment to remember where he is - and who is brewing the coffee - but when he realizes, he nearly jumps out of his bed. "Kai!", he exclaims, trying hard not to add a nickname, "are you in the kitchen?"

In reply, he hears the sweetest chuckle he can imagine. "Yes, but stay where you are, sleepyhead!"

Julian stops in the hallway. "Why?" he asks, his heartbeat pacing up.

"Go back to your room, you’ll see," Kai answers happily. Julian can hear him rummaging in the kitchen but in the end, he obeys, making a quick stop at his bathroom. After some minutes that Julian spends in his bed again, he hears Kai approaching. "Close your eyes!" he orders.

"What are you doing?" Julian asks but he fulfills Kai’s wish, waiting for whatever Kai has in stake for him.

"Surprise!" Kai eventually shouts proudly and Julian opens his eyes. Kai holds a tray in his hand, filled with two mugs of coffee, buns, butter, jam and two glasses of orange juice. He beams at Julian, his eyes glowing. "Can I join you? I though we might have breakfast in bed!"

Julian nearly chokes and takes a glass of orange juice with the last sparks of self-control that are still left in him. He empties the entire glass in one sip. "That’s a wonderful idea, Kai," he croaks out, lifting his blanket to invite his friend. Julian is not sure how he will survive Kai laying in his bed and he takes a hold on his mug of coffee, grabbing the porcelain for dear life.

"How did you sleep?" he eventually asks Kai who has taken a bun with butter and jam, eating it with great appetite.

"I had such a relaxing night," Kai munches, "when I woke up on the sofa I tiptoed to your room but you were already asleep. So I went to bed as well."  
  
Julian preferably wants to punch himself that he didn’t stay awake and he grabs the mug even tighter.

"What’s up with you?" Kai questions, "are you not eating anything? The buns are delicious, I bought them this morning at a bakery nearby!"

Half-heartedly, Julian takes a bun and bites into it. He can already feel his body reacting to Kai’s closeness, not only in lower regions. Mustering all of his resistance, Julian manages to not just stroke over Kai’s messy hair, bringing it back into order. He so wants to touch Kai, to hold him, to kiss him.

"I’m not hungry but the coffee is excellent," Julian mutters, gazing at Kai. God, he’s so in love with him.

"Thank you," Kai replies, "can I have your bun as well?"

Julian nods weakly, watching Kai eating his breakfast. He’s handsome in every situation, even when he’s crumbling into Julian’s bed.

"When do you have to leave?" Julian asks, taking a sip from his coffee. He wants Kai to stay forever but at the same time, he almost cannot take this any longer. Glimpsing underneath the blanket, Julian tries to unsuspiciously check if he can get up.

"Everything alright?" Kai tilts his head to the side.

Julian blushes immediately. "Yeah, my leg just went dead," he pretends.

"You should walk a little bit then," Kai suggests.

"No!" Julian exclaims, holding the blanket. "No, I’m fine," he answers quieter.

"You sure?" Kai starts. "I’ll have to leave in two hours. But we have to return here as soon as possible! I have two days off again next week. What do you think? We will meet here, won’t we?"

"I’ll have to check my schedule first," Julian murmurs. Kai’s scent is filling his nose, he can feel Kai’s limbs underneath the blanket, he can hear his enticing voice and damn it, Kai is almost naked except for a shirt and boxer-shorts.

It’s too much.

"I’ll go to the bathroom," Julian announces, swinging his legs out of the bed. He hides his front side from Kai while he walks away awkwardly.

"Good luck!" Kai snickers, munching away the last bits of the buns.  
  
With a dizzy feeling, Julian splashes cold water into his face but he cannot forget about the fact that Kai is still in his bed. Desperately, Julian tries to gain back the sovereignty about his body. He tells himself over and over again that Kai is just a friend and eventually, he succeeds at least partly. Still nourishing a half-hard boner, Julian returns to Kai.  
  
"You look good in all of your… eh… morning glory," Kai says ambiguously.

"You’re a bastard," Julian snorts playfully, throwing a cushion after Kai.

"Pillow fight!" Kai exclaims delighted. Soon, they are engaged in a vivid match, breathlessly waving cushions through the air. In the end, Julian’s largest cushion looses almost all of its feathers with a loud crack.  
  
"Oh shit," Kai states, looking at the mess they have caused. He hesitates, searching for Julian’s gaze. "You can sleep with me in my bed next time until we get a vacuum cleaner," Kai breathes.

And for the second time, time stands still between them.

"With pleasure," Julian replies hoarsely.

"Deal," Kai whispers. He still looks at Julian with his big, beautiful eyes but eventually, he stands up hastily. "I’ll have to take a shower, then I’ll drive back," he mutters, almost storming out of the room.  
  
For long minutes, Julian just sits in between a pile of feathers, trying to get everything together again. He listens to the noises that Kai makes in the shower, wanting nothing more than to be beside him.

Finally, he sighs and gets up as well, taking the tray and bringing it back to the kitchen. He distracts himself with putting the dishes away until Kai returns from his bathroom, already neatly dressed. His bag hangs from his shoulder but he puts it to the floor.

"Hey, there’s still a feather in your hair," Kai says and comes closer, carefully plucking the feather away. The simple touch has Julian on the edge within a heartbeat. "Thank you for your time," Kai whispers, hugging Julian tightly. He waits for a moment, about to add something, and eventually, he says it. "You’re my home as well, Jule."


	5. A stormy night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, this is a longer chapter - I can’t believe that I wrote it in one go. These two are killing me! I hope that you enjoy the update.

The next week passes by quickly with training sessions and a matchday. Julian looks forward to meet Kai in their flat afterwards. They have played at the same day, so they would probably have the same days off as well.

A call however shatters all of Julian’s hopes.

"Jule?" Kai says strained, "I cannot come tomorrow. We’ll have an extra training session. The coach is not satisfied with our performance." He makes a pause. "I think he meant especially me."

"Don’t say that!" Jule answers, thinking both of their failed date and of Kai’s self-accusation.

Kai laughs bitterly. "Watch our last match, then you’ll know what I mean."

Julian rubs his eyes. He has been in this place before, full of doubts. And he knows that he cannot really console Kai. He can only be there for him but Kai has to find a way out of his hole himself. "Try to come after your training session, Kai. We can talk then. Here, in our hide-away."

"I don’t think that it will work," Kai replies. He’s clearly miserable, that much Julian can sense.

"I will be there. In our flat. And for you. I will always be there for you, Kai."

Kai sighs a relieved breath into the microphone of his mobile. "I know Jule. I know."

***

Julian drives to their flat the next day without the slightest hope of meeting Kai there. Extra trainings are always hard, meant to be a punishment and an encouragement all at once.

Arriving at the flat, Julian smiles melancholily when he sees the feathers that are still draped all across his bed and his room. He decides to sleep in Kai’s bed this night. Briefly, he muses if he should buy a vacuum cleaner, but he has no nerves to go out into the public.

He wants to be alone.  
  
Or, preferably, with Kai.

Taking a deep breath, Julian falls down onto Kai’s bed. His scent is still there and he buries his nose into Kai’s cushion. Julian is not sure what he should do next so he walks over to the living room and starts the TV. Out of the blue, he chooses Leverkusen’s last match, wanting to admire Kai in all of his shining glory.

Only that Kai isn’t shining on the pitch at the moment. Furrowing his brows, Julian watches the entire match, worried about his friend. Kai looks somehow lost and very, very fragile. Julian grabs his mobile and texts him.

_I’m in our flat. Come over if you can._

Kai doesn’t read the message, of course not. He’s probably still sweating on the training ground.

Suddenly, Julian cannot help but send more messages to Kai. He feels that his friend needs it - or he tells himself so because he cannot stop the urge to text him.  
  
_I saw your match. You weren’t bad but you make a bothered impression. Talk to me, that will help._

Julian presses the "send" button but when he reads the message another time, he is not satisfied with himself. At first, he types another text into his mobile, a long one. Then, he hesitates and erases all of the letters. In the end, he only sends Kai three words.  
  
_I miss you._

***

Julian stays awake and watches the replay of more matches. BVB matches, Leverkusen matches. A compilation of Kai’s best goals. Eventually, he gets too tired from waiting for Kai who won’t show up anyways and goes to bed. He’s tempted to open Kai’s wardrobe to sleep in his shirt but he doesn’t want to be creepy. Instead, he enwraps himself in Kai’s blanket like in a cocoon.

Considering how he could help Kai, Julian eventually falls asleep. He dreams of Kai, a weird dream where they are still playing together, celebrating together. He dreams about their entire routine after a match, from taking a shower to driving home to going to bed.

When the Kai in his dream crawls under the blanket, Julian thinks that he can feel his touch underneath his own duvet. He sighs happily in his sleep, dreaming about Kai sharing a bed with him. The dream goes on for a long time, until the first sun rays tickle Julian’s nose. He awakes well-rested, the memories of his nightly experience still vivid in his mind.

Opening his eyes, Julian blinks against the sun. He wonders why even Kai’s scent seems to be stronger than the evening before - until he feels a movement underneath the blanket that isn’t caused by his own limbs.

Julian flinches and pants alarmed, his eyes going wide in surprise. Here, right next to him, still drowsily, lies the man he loves more than anything else in the world.

"Good morning, Jule," Kai whispers, looking like a deer in the glaring headlights. "I’m sorry that I frightened you but I really didn’t want to be alone." There’s panic in his voice now and Julian hurries to console Kai although he is still startled himself.

"It’s fine. Everything is fine, Kai."

Kai shakes his head and curls himself up into a ball. He doesn’t beat around the bush. "I’m not sure what I should do. All the pressure upon me, it’s too much, Jule."

Julian considers frantically what to do with his desperate friend while still trying to get his head around the fact that they slept in the same bed. "How long can you stay?" he asks.

„Until tomorrow," Kai mumbles.

"Okay," Julian makes a plan, "I have training in some hours but I can come back afterwards. I’ll take care of you then."

"Really?" Kai looks so vulnerable that Julian’s heart nearly breaks.

"Really. Some distraction will do you good. We can play Fifa or Fortnite and we can cook together."

"And sleep together in my bed?" Kai asks hopefully.

Julian swallows hard. "Yes. Yes, we can."

***

Preferably, Julian wants to take Kai with him to Dortmund. He feels bad leaving him alone in his flat but Kai can’t come with him, otherwise the papers would be full of transfer rumors the next day.

Never in his life has Julian showered after a training session that quickly. His hair still wet, he jumps into his car - just to hear Marco knocking against the window. Marco who is still injured and in rehab.

"Hey, you look like the devil is after you!" Marco jokes.

Reluctantly, Julian opens the window. "I have an appointment," he shrugs.

Marco grins. "With whom?" He shows his crooked, mischievous smile but Julian really doesn’t have time to admire Marco’s beauty.

„With someone," Julian murmurs. He knows that Marco will probably tease him from that moment on whenever he has the chance to do so, but his captain just winks at him for now.

"Have fun, little one," Marco replies docilely, giving Julian a thumbs up.

Stepping on the gas pedal, Julian leaves the training ground behind. Leaves Dortmund. Heads towards Kai.

***

"Kai! I’m back!" Julian shouts from the hallway, throwing the door shut. He finds Kai in the living room, in front of the TV. Watching a Dortmund game.

"You were so stunning," Kai murmurs, his eyes glued to the screen. "Your goals, superb."

Julian hesitates, leaning against the doorframe. "Don’t do that, Kai," he says quietly. "Don’t torture yourself."

"Watching you play will never be torture," Kai replies, turning around. "How was your training?"

"Good. Marco stopped me, otherwise I would have been here sooner." Kai’s face darkens when he hears Marco’s name.

"What did he want from you?" he asks mistrustfully.

"Just knowing where I am going." Julian still doesn’t get why Kai is always so upset because of Marco.

"Did you tell him?!" Kai is on alert now, Julian can sense his tension.

"No! What do you think!" Julian comes closer, concerned about Kai’s pale skin. All of a sudden, he has an idea.

"Let’s go for a walk, should we?" he asks to his own surprise because usually, he hates walks. But it is already dark outside so that nobody can recognize them, and Kai could probably use some fresh air.

"A walk?" Kai echoes, clearly not convinced.

"Yeah. A walk. We should explore our surrounding." Julian leaves his shoes on, pointing at the door. "Come on. Just some minutes."

"Okay mom," Kai replies, managing a small wink.

Within five minutes, they are out of the door. The cold, nightly air clears Julian’s mind as they walk through the streets into the direction of a forest nearby. "Kai, you should take things as they come," he starts. "I know that there is so much pressure upon you, I know that you have to make the most important decision in your life. But you are clever. Probably Germany’s most talented young player. Don’t make the mistake to doubt yourself."

Kai chews on his lips. "I feel so helpless sometimes. People are expecting this and that from me, everybody wants something. But what do _I_ want? I don’t know. I really don’t know."

"You still have time to decide. Take that time. You have all the options. You can stay in Leverkusen, you can move to a bigger club in Germany. You can go abroad. It’s all up to you."

"Yesterday," Kai murmurs, clearing his voice. "Your message yesterday. Did you mean that?"

"Which message?" Julian asks, just to make sure.

"That you miss me," Kai whispers, hands buried in his jacket. He doesn’t look at Julian as if he is fearing the answer.

Julian stops, taking Kai’s arm. "Of course I meant that. I always miss you when we are not together."

Kai nods, as if he is coming to an inner conclusion. "I miss you too," he confesses.

Silently, the first drops of a rain shower start to fall. Kai looks into the sky, soaking up the wetness. Julian can’t tell whether he is crying or not and he knows that he shouldn’t ask.

"Let’s go back home," Julian suggests, gently tugging at Kai’s arm.  
  
"Yes. Home." Kai replies, gazing thankfully at his friend.

***

By the time they decide to go to bed after they have ordered pizza, not able to cook themselves, the rain gets heavier. Julian uses his own bathroom, not daring to bother Kai. Shyly, he knocks at Kai’s door after he has gone through his bedtime routine, wearing a simple black shirt and checked boxers. "Am I allowed to come in?"

Kai nods, looking slightly better. "You can come in. In my room and in my bed."

Julian comes closer. It feels strange to sleep with Kai in a bed, to crawl underneath his blanket. But most of all, it is arousing as hell. Julian thinks about all the bad things in his life, his missed goal chances, Christmas gifts he didn’t like, just to keep the lower part of his body under control.

"Thank you for your support, Jule," Kai states honestly. "I don’t know where I would be without you."

"That’s nothing," Jule pretends although _everything_ is happening in his groin right now. With a sigh, he gives in, letting his desire having its way with his body.

Kai switches the lights off. "Sleep tight," he murmurs.  
  
"Thank you. Sleep tight too, Kai." Julian can hear Kai’s breaths but he cannot sleep. Not with Kai so close, so warm beside him. For long minutes, he listens to Kai’s breathing, probably for hours. Eventually, he dozes off. After god knows how long, a sudden rumbling wakes him up. Seconds later, a flash enlightens the room and Julian can see that Kai is standing in front of the window, gazing outside.

"Is that a thunderstorm?" Julian asks drowsily.

"It is. A heavy one," Kai replies, voice trembling. He inhales a deep breath. „I hate thunderstorms."

Julian climbs out of the bed, the room pitch-black again. With the next lightning, he approaches Kai. "Don’t be afraid," Julian whispers, "I’m here."

The bedroom turns dark and Julian can only sense Kai’s presence. Later, he doesn’t remember why he made his move, he just knew that it was the right time and the right place.

Tenderly, Julian wraps his arms around Kai from behind, simply holding him. With a shiver, Kai gives in to the touch, leaning against Julian.

There’s another flash and there’s Kai’s hand upon Julian’s. "Jule," he whispers into the darkness. "Jule."

Julian pulls Kai gently closer and strokes his hand. "I have you Kai. I will always have you."

Another loud rumbling is accompanied by a lightning bolt, so bright that Julian can see the following scene clearly. Kai turns around, his precious Kai, like china in his hands. Julian doesn’t think twice and takes Kai’s handsome face into his hands.

In the midst of the thunderstorm Julian forgets about everything else around him. He bends towards Kai, bends towards his lips, and kisses him for the first time. It’s a shy, questioning kiss at first, and for an aching second Julian thinks that he has gone too far.

But then, Kai kisses him back. Kai’s hands find his hips and he holds them while he parts Julian’s lips with his tongue, exploring him.

It’s the best kiss Julian has ever had. He’s putty in Kai’s hands, losing his mind in between his caresses. The thunder comes and goes, and so do the flashes, but Julian doesn’t care. His world has melted to Kai’s mouth, his lips and his tongue.

"I wanted to do that for a long time," Julian confesses rawly when they need to catch their breaths.

"Me too, Sunshine," Kai whispers. He tugs Julian back to his bed, kissing him senseless there.

Only slowly, realization what has happened hits Julian, and he beams at Kai, ridiculously happy. He wants to never leave this bed, starved for Kai’s kisses. Their tongues meet again and again, so soft and tender. Julian is amazed that Kai is such a good kisser, he simply cannot get enough of him.

"Can you hold me while we sleep?" Kai eventually asks. "From behind, I mean." He turns around shyly, offering Julian his back. Almost solemnly, Julian wraps his arm around Kai’s waist, his head resting at Kai’s neck.

"Your smell is enticing," Julian whispers. He still tries to hide his erection from Kai, cautious to not scare him away.

It turns out that he is afraid of nothing. "I can feel you, Jule," Kai breathes.

"I’m sorry," Julian replies.  
  
"Don’t be, Sunshine." Kai turns around and steals another kiss from Julian, hesitating then. "Did you ever do that before?" he wants to know. "With a man, I mean."

"No," Julian replies in all honesty. "And you?"

"Me neither," Kai states. "But I want it. With you. I want you, to be precise."

Julian feels dizzy from all the endorphins in his body. "I want you too. I want to be together with you."

Kai snuggles closer against Julian. "Can we just take it slow?" he asks.

“Yes. We have all the time in the world." Julian nuzzles Kai’s neck. "And we have our flat here."

Kai chuckles. "Buying the flat was the second-best idea you ever had."

"Hey, and what was my best idea?" Julian buries his nose in Kai’s fragrant hair.

Kai sighs blissfully. "Kissing me, of course."


	6. A curious teammate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, I hope that you will enjoy this update! Feedback is precious. :-)
> 
> On a side-note: I sometimes associate certain songs with my stories. If you want to listen to it, this story’s theme is „Because the Night“ in the original version by Patti Smith. I think that it is so fitting for Bravertz and it is one of my favorite songs ever.

The next morning, Julian awakes before Kai. He whistles cheerfully while he goes to his bathroom, preparing another breakfast in bed for them afterwards. This time, he would be able to crumble into_ Kai’s_ bed, Julian thinks with a smile.

Kai’s bed in which he has spent the night.

Julian remembers everything, how good it has felt to hold Kai during the night, how angelic he has looked in his sleep. Somewhen during the early morning hours, they have changed positions with Kai wrapping his arms firmly around Julian.

"I can feel you too, Kai," Julian has whispered, half asleep but blissfully happy.

Slicing an apple into pieces, Julian listens into the direction of Kai’s room, but his friend - _boyfriend?_ \- seems to be still sound asleep.

Carefully, Julian puts two mugs of coffee onto the tray and returns to Kai’s room, hoping that it would be their room from now on. He watches Kai slowly coming back to life, stretching himself.

"Did you prepare breakfast for us, Sunshine?" he asks and Julian cannot help but beam all over his face when he hears his nickname.

"I tried my best," he answers.

Kai winks at him. "You always give your best. I’ll go to the bathroom quickly, then we can enjoy our breakfast."

The atmosphere between them is full of unspoken feelings, full of unasked questions about the last night. But when Kai comes back from the bathroom, joining Julian in bed, he slowly turns towards him, his lips so full and rosy.

It feels only natural to kiss Kai again, Julian thinks while their lips meet, while his hands find Kai’s skin. They kiss intensively this time, a kiss that lasts for eternal moments with tongues reaching parts they have never explored before. "I’m already addicted to that," Julian confesses.

"Don’t even ask me," Kai whispers. The breakfast is long forgotten but when Julian’s stomach starts to rumble, Kai chuckles. "Take a bun first, Sunshine. I don’t want you to be starved when you return to training."

"I’m starved of other things than food," Julian replies, his gaze traveling hungrily over Kai’s body.

Kai takes a bun and bites into it. "Later, Sunshine," he munches. "When we’re back from the training sessions."

Julian nearly spills his coffee. "Did you just suggest…" he asks.

"I guess you’ll have to find out," Kai grins.

***

In the end, they take their showers in two different bathrooms but with a heart full of love. Without many spoken words, they agree on keeping their blooming relationship a secret for now.

That is until Julian arrives at the training ground in Dortmund and runs straight into Marco.

"Hey, little one!" Marco stops Julian, "how was your date?"

Julian takes a deep breath, trying to play it cool. "Which date?"

Marco rolls his eyes. "Oh come on. You know exactly what I’m talking about."

"Great." Julian replies monosyllabically.

Marco punches him in the side. "What’s the name of your… date?"

"Ka…_eh_… tharina. Katharina is her name. Or just Kati", Julian pretends, starting to sweat.

Marco furrows his brows. "Katharina," he replies, shaking his head. "Well, anyways. I’m organizing a little party for our new players next week. Maybe you can bring Kati with you?"

"No!" Julian exclaims. "She is… very busy."

"I see," Marco replies and Julian thinks that he’s released for now. Just when he is about to walk away, Marco holds his arm. "Jule, do you think that I'm an idiot?" he asks dangerously quiet.

"Why?" Julian answers to gain some time.  
  
"Because you’re treating me like one."

***

Julian is lacking concentration during the entire training. Frantically, he tries to remember if he has given anything away, if Marco knows about Kai’s and his little secret. Every time that Marco looks at him, he tries to hold his gaze, eventually looking away. And slowly but steadily, he starts to panic.

Marco doesn’t let show anything during the entire training session, apart from his gazes into Julian’s direction. He’s joking with the others like he always does but Julian knows that Marco is not done with him.

Wanting it to be over, Julian dawdles in the shower after the training session. He hopes that Marco waits for him so that they can have their inevitable talk. However, when he steps out of the shower, Marco is already gone.

***

"Kai? Kai are you here?"

Julian throws the keys of his car onto the table but Kai isn’t back from his training session yet.

Pacing up and down, Julian tries to get a clear head. Could Marco really be in the picture about them? He’s not sure. Julian could smack himself inwardly for his own stupidity. Katharina. Of course.

Finally, after half an eternity, Kai opens the door.

"Oh goodness, you’re back," Julian sighs relieved just to feel a new wave of panic. "I think that Marco knows about us," he blurts out.

Kai freezes. "What did you tell him?"

"Nothing!" Julian replies, explaining to Kai what has happened.  
  
"Katharina?" Kai snorts when he has heard the entire story, "are you serious?"

"No, I’m not!" Julian sighs.

"Marco must have observed you quite closely," Kai muses. "Could it be that he followed you?"

"I don’t think so. Maybe he just got a vibe of us when we’re with the national team," Julian considers.

"He probably got a vibe of you!" Kai exclaims, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

Julian doesn’t understand him. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing!" Kai states, pulling a face. "I just hear 'Marco' all of the time."

Suddenly, it dawns on Julian. "Kai. Are you jealous?" he asks, astonished about his own realization.

"Me? Jealous? Of Marco?" Kai protests.

Julian just looks at him without saying anything.

Kai takes a deep breath. "Well… yes", he admits sheepishly.

"There’s no reason to be jealous of Marco!" Julian whispers, taking Kai into his arms. "Absolutely no reason."

Julian kisses Kai deeply, passionately, surprised about Kai’s hunger when he kisses him back.

In silent agreement, they stumble straight into the direction of Kai’s room, still kissing.  
  
"You’re the most wonderful man in the universe," Julian breathes into Kai’s ear, "I only have eyes for you."

They fall onto the mattress, trading more kisses, when Kai’s hand suddenly finds its way under Julian’s shirt. The touch feels electric and Julian moans softly before he sits up and pulls his shirt over his head. "I’m all yours, Kai. And only yours," he whispers.

Kai’s soft fingers upon his chest do miracles to him. Kai is exploring him slowly and Julian watches him, but when Kai strokes over his nipples, Julian has to bite into a cushion.  
  
"Do you like that?" Kai asks.  
  
"And how," Julian pants. His pants turn into little moans when Kai bends over him and kisses his nipples. "I didn’t know that this would be so amazing," Julian manages to say.

Kai chuckles and licks Julian’s nipple again.

"You know what you are doing to me?" Julian breathes.

"No," Kai replies innocently.

"I’ll show you," Julian says, tugging at the hem of Kai’s shirt.

Soon, they have changed roles and Kai is panting underneath Julian who cannot get enough of tasting Kai with his hands and with his tongue. He strokes over his flanks and abs, kisses his nipples, loving each and every sound that Kai makes.

"Is that good for you?" Julian asks breathlessly, still insecure if he is doing everything right.

"Yes. Jule…" Kai murmurs with a strange undertone before he inhales a shaky breath. "Can we change again?" he begs, propping himself up on an elbow rather hastily.

Julian wants to say something but he is immediately distracted because Kai’s lips find his bare skin. This is so amazing, every caress shooting straight into his groin. "We’ll have to stop," Julian whispers, "Kai. Please."

"Did I do anything wrong? Kai asks alarmed, gazing at Julian.

"No," Julian drawls, "it’s just… that my pants are getting too tight." He blushes furiously and bites onto his lips.  
  
"Then why don’t you take them off?" Kai replies.

"What? Are you sure?" Julian’s eyes grow big.

"Of course, Sunshine," Kai says. "Get them off."

With a luge lump in his throat, Julian gets rid of his jeans. He feels so vulnerable, here in Kai’s bed with only his briefs left.

With his briefs and a large bulge.

"I have never done this before," Kai starts, now apparently pretty much excited himself, "so you’ll have to stop me if I make a wrong move."

Julian still doesn’t know if he has understood Kai right, but… "Kai!" he exclaims, "oh my god." There are Kai’s fingers traveling over the hardness covered by Julian’s briefs, slowly and cautiously exploring the entire length.

"You don’t have to do that," Julian pants. His body however screams for more, the touch so arousing that every nerve in Julian’s body is on fire.

Kai hasn’t even heard him. "You’re so beautiful," he murmurs, clearly fascinated by what he is sensing underneath his fingertips.

Julian holds his breath, desperately trying to keep calm, but when Kai’s fingers caress his balls, he looses it straight away.

With a strangled moan that sounds a lot like Kai’s name, Julian comes. The orgasm is so intense that he gasps for air, the first contraction rolling over him like a huge wave. He barely notices that Kai still strokes him gently before he takes Julian’s hand and entangles their fingers.

Julian needs a few moments or even minutes until he can think clearly. "I’m sorry," he mutters, not able to move a single limb.

Kai gazes at him. "Why?" he asks confused.

"For… coming so quickly. Without warning." He can feel that his cheeks redden more, if that is even possible.

Kai shakes his head and holds Julian’s hand tighter. "Did I already mention that you are a dork?"

Julian rolls onto his side with effort, still worn out from his height. "A dork who comes straight into his briefs?" he says embarrassedly.

"Jule," Kai starts, "we have never done this before, right?"  
  
"Right," Julian admits.

"So it’s a huge compliment for my non-existing skills in pleasing you that I was so successful." Kai gazes at Julian proudly.

"Non-exisiting skills?" Julian snorts, "you’re a fucking natural talent. Just look at me!"

"Well, I guess that you’ll have to change your briefs. But otherwise you look amazing!" Kai states. "You have that special glow," he chuckles pleased.

"Just wait until I give you that special glow as well," Julian whispers, his hand slowly disappearing under the blanket.

Kai lets out a surprised moan when Julian softly places his hand onto his jeans. "Come on, get it off," he begs, helping Kai to strip his pants down. Afterwards, they share a kiss, but Julian soon cannot wait to feel Kai the way Kai has felt him before.

His hand ghosts over Kai’s briefs, sensing his arousal there. Julian is already intrigued by the feeling, trying to explore every bit of it. Kai’s breathing becomes ragged, that much Julian can hear when tugs carefully at the waistband of Kai’s briefs. "May I?" he asks softly. When he earns a nod, his fingers slip inside Kai’s boxers, as tenderly as he can.

The effect is gorgeous, both for Kai and for Julian himself. Julian wraps his fingers carefully around Kai’s hardness, moving them slowly. "Sunshine," Kai pants, "yes, just like that." He doesn’t need to say it twice with Julian increasing his efforts in the tight space of Kai’s briefs, his thumb grazing over the tip of Kai’s dick in a first, shy attempt.

Kai comes almost immediately afterwards. He’s not as quiet as Julian has been, groaning Julian’s nickname several times. Julian leaves his hand where it is until Kai has given everything to him, going limp onto the mattress.

"You lasted longer than I did," Julian whispers, kissing Kai deeply.

"Yeah, like five seconds," Kai breathes spent. "Honestly, Jule, we have to do that more often."

He’s so serious that Julian laughs happily. "Whenever you want to."

Kai stretches himself like a tomcat and reaches for his mobile on the nightstand. "I just want to check how late it is. Maybe we have time for another round of proving our non-existent skills to each other." Glimpsing at the display, a swearword escapes Kai. "Oh fuck," he mutters.

"Did you miss your next training or what?" Julian asks, not willing to let Kai go so soon.

Yet, Kai is already somewhere else in his thoughts. "No," he grits out, "I missed a call."

"From whom?" Julian asks because Kai still stares at his mobile in utter disbelief.

Kai looks up. "I missed a call from Marco," he replies.


	7. A tremendous party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, please have fun with this update! Comments and kudos are my fuel for the next chapter. :-) 
> 
> By the way, I’m searching for a nickname for Kai. What would Julian probably say to him? Do you have any suggestions?

"A call. From Marco?" Jule feels dizzy all of a sudden, and not only from his breathtaking height.

"Shhh," Kai interrupts him, listening to his mailbox, the mobile tightly pressed against his ear.

"What does he want!" Jule urges Kai, rolling onto his belly but Kai just shakes his head, still occupied with the message Marco has left for him. Finally, he puts his mobile away. "Come on, spill it out!" Jule repeats, tugging impatiently at Kai’s arm.

Kai is still confused. "He invited me to the party for the new players too. Told me that it would include the new players of the national team as well." He rubs his temples. "There is something wrong here."

"I told you so!" Julian says, "what do we do now?"

Kai gazes at Julian. "I’ll come with you to said party of course."

"Are you nuts?" Julian nearly yells. "That’s what Marco wants. He wants to catch us in the act, Kai!"

"Apropos 'act'", Kai smiles, "that was really nice."  
  
"I can’t believe that you are so cool," Julian whispers.

"I’m not cool, I’m realistic. The best defense is offense. You as a footballer should know that!" Kai climbs out of the bed.

"Hey, where are you going?" Julian pouts.

"To the bathroom. And then back to you. And next week to Marco’s party. Period."  
  
  
***  
  
  
During the next days, they don’t have time to meet in their flat, due to training sessions, team meetings and matches. Marco however still finds time to tease Julian. "Is it still certain that Kati can’t come to my party?" he asks Julian casually after he steps out of the locker room. "By the way, did Kai tell you that I invited him?"

"Yes, he did," Julian answers.

"Will you come to my place together?" Marco insists.

"Hell, Marco, I don’t know yet. Probably yes," Julian tries to shake his captain off.

Marco is satisfied. "I thought so," he whistles before he walks away.  
  
  
***  
  
  
"What kind of party is that?" Kai asks Julian when they meet in their flat, an hour before Marco expects them to show up at his house. "And do we return to our flat here afterwards? It’s too long to drive back home for me," he drawls.

"You bet that we return here," Julian grits out, "I can’t wait for this evening to be over."

"Oh come on, we’re having a date!" Kai says cheerfully, tugging a white shirt over his head.

"I’d rather have a date with you alone," Julian rasps. "Do we still have time to…?"

"We better wait until we’re back," Kai replies, "I don’t know, maybe Marco can smell what we did otherwise." He blushes and fumbles with his shoe-laces.

"What did you just say?" Julian chuckles, giving Kai a peck. "Marco might have the killer instinct on the pitch but he definitely cannot detect if we had… _sex_." He breathes the last word into Kai’s ear.  
  
"Just wait until I’ll have you in my bed again, Sunshine," Kai whispers, kissing Julian fiercely.  
  
  
***  
  
  
They drive to Marco’s house in Julian’s car, almost not speaking. Julian tries to prepare himself mentally for every trap that might be ahead, for every nosy question Marco or some of the other guests might have.

Sooner than he would have liked to, they arrive at Marco’s place. There are only a few lights switched on and definitely no music. Julian furrows his brows when he climbs out of his car. "Doesn’t look like a huge party to me," he murmurs, "there are almost no other cars here. Are we too early?"

"Naah, like ten minutes too late," Kai mutters. He looks intimidated now as well, hesitantly closing the passenger door.

Julian takes a deep breath and marches to the entrance, Kai on his heels.

"What do we do if he asks us about… well, you know." Kai whispers.

"That’s a bit late to decide, thank you," Julian murmurs, "but well… if he really is in the picture, we won’t deny it."  
  
"No, we won’t," Kai repeats, but he doesn’t sound convinced. He rather makes the impression of a school boy who is afraid of a math exam.

Strengthening his shoulders, Julian rings at Marco’s door bell. After like two seconds, Marco opens. "Oh hey, good that you are here!" Marco pats Julian’s shoulders and hugs Kai. "Please, come inside."

Julian glimpses into every direction of Marco’s property that he can see, but he still cannot detect any other guests. "Are we the only ones you invited?" he eventually blurts out.

To his surprise, Marco blushes slightly. "Well, Toto couldn’t come because of his kids and Nico is still in rehab… so it’s indeed just you, Kai, I and…"

"Me." The sound of a very familiar voice rings in Julian’s ears and he stares horrified at the person who has stepped right next to Marco.  
  
Mats.  
  
"Is this… some kind of inquisition, or what?" Julian stammers, making an unintelligible sound when Kai punches him forcefully into the side.

"Why should it be?" Mats wonders, now punching Marco into the side. "What did you even tell them?"

"I just invited them to a party!" Marco defends himself, visibly pouting.  
  
"You’re such an idiot, Marco," Mats mutters, "but anyways, I hope that we will have a lovely evening together."

"Well. Yes." Kai finally says something.

There’s silence between them and Julian literally can grab the tension. Kai and he don’t know what Marco and Mats want from them and Marco and Mats obviously aren’t willing to tell them either. With a sigh, he points into the hallway. "Do you have something to drink? I’ll have to drive, but Kai can probably use some alcohol."

"Of course!" Marco replies, guiding them to his huge living room. "We also prepared some food," he states.

"The catering service did," Mats replies dryly, "otherwise we would be starving tonight."

Julian desperately wants to have a glass of wine or anything to get a hold on to, but he just lets himself fall onto Marco’s sofa. "Maybe later," he states, suddenly pissed about the entire situation. "You better tell us why we are here straight away."

Kai flinches vehemently when he hears the word "straight" but bites into a piece of sushi he has found on one of the platters, his hand trembling.

"Do you want to start?" Marco asks Mats, but Mats shakes his head.  
  
"No. This was your idea, captain," he retorts, grabbing some food himself.

"Okay," Marco tries. "We found out that you are very close friends," he begins, Julian’s eyes widening in shock. "Like really close friends. Isn’t it so?"

Mats looks at Julian who nods carefully. "We’re friends. Just like you and Mats."

"Oh, I think that you are even closer friends," Mats helps Marco out.

"What do you want to say?" Julian asks, sweating.

"Look, you have so much in common," Marco continues. "You go on vacation together, you spend your free time with each other. I would even say that besides your parents and siblings, there is no other person who knows you better than you know each other."

From the corner of his eyes, Julian can see that Kai pales more and more. "As I said, we are friends," he repeats sternly.

"Isn’t it hard for you sometimes that you are separated now? Wouldn’t you want to live in a flat nearby, maybe even in the same flat?" Mats insists.

With a loud bang, Kai drops his plate onto the table. "If you know the answers already, why do you even ask us," he manages to say. "Yes, we do live…"

"…the same lifestyle," Julian practically shouts, just to silence Kai.

Marco gazes at Mats. "Now what do _you_ want to tell _us_?" he asks in confusion.

There is silence again, accompanied by glances all over the room.

Finally, Julian cracks. "You are right," he murmurs. "Kai and I…" he glimpses helplessly at Kai.

"We are a couple," Kai finishes for him.

"You are what?!" Marco exclaims, his eyes big like saucers.

Mats stands up, pacing through Marco’s living room. "Did you just tell us that you are together? Like in 'sharing a bed and spending the nights with each other'?"

Julian really has enough. "Yes, you heard us! That’s why we should have come here in the first place, to that… that… fucking fake party. Isn’t it so! Do you think I’m dumb or what?"

"Well, I definitely didn’t think that you’re gay," Mats replies.

Marco still shakes his head. "We had no clue," he states perplexed. "We just wanted to meet you because we are trying to convince Kai to join BVB."

"Pardon me?" Kai is paler than Marco’s wall by now.

"Yeah, we thought that we can talk some sense into you before you make the decision about your move and that Jule would be helpful for that undertaking," Mats adds.

"So we outed ourselves for no reason?" Julian coughs. If he would have more energy left in his body, he would probably punch his teammates.

Mats sighs and sits down next to Julian, wrapping an arm around him. "I’m sorry, Jule. You have our support, you now that, right?"

"Get away from him," Kai hisses.

"Listen Kai, we didn’t want to…" Marco starts but Kai simply stares him down.

"Never mind, he’s just jealous," Julian murmurs.

"You’re especially attractive when you’re jealous, Kai," Marco tries to rescue the situation with a joke, only to make it even worse.

"Now I’m jealous too," Julian snorts.

"Mats?" Marco asks tonelessly. "I fucked it up, didn’t I"?

Mats pats Marco’s shoulder in a fatherly but also slightly pitiful gesture. "It’s okay, captain."

Julian crosses his arms in front of his chest. To his utter surprise, it’s Kai who breaks the silence. "I wouldn’t say that you fucked it up, Marco," he says. "You could try to convince me nevertheless. Why should I join Dortmund? I’m listening."

Julian gazes at Kai astonished but Marco is so mixed-up that he apparently doesn’t find the right words. "Well…", he begins. "Well… we have Jule," he finally states.

"Guess what," Kai grins, "I have Jule too."  
  
  
***  
  
  
From that moment on, the evening gets more relaxed. Marco and Mats give their best to present themselves from their best sides and finally, Julian loses his tension. Maybe it is even helpful that his captain and his vice-captain know about Kai and him.

At one point, Marco asks Julian about Kati. "I thought that you just wanted to go home straight away to play Fortnite when you told me about that obviously non-existing girl."

"Marco," Mats adds, "didn’t you notice that Kati and Kai almost sound similar?"

"Now that you're saying it…" Marco murmurs embarrassedly. "So you drove to Kai?"

Julian nods. "And that’s what we will do now too, it’s late. I have your word that our secret remains between us?"

"Of course!" Marco and Mats reply in unison.

"But… do you really live together? I thought that you have a flat here in Dortmund?" Marco apparently cannot help to ask.

"I’ll tell you about that the next time," Julian winks. "I guess you’ll have to digest what we revealed to you anyways." He nods into Kai’s direction. "And I appreciate that you want to have him here in Dortmund. But it’s his decision and I will support him wherever he wants to go to."

Kai gazes at Julian surprised. "Thank you," he states before he stands up as well, not without taking another piece of sushi.  
  
  
***  
  
  
Finally, when they are out of Marco’s house and in his car, Julian fumbles with the belt of the driver’s seat, just wanting to get away. "I… wouldn’t have expected that," he says still confused, stepping onto the gas pedal.

"Me neither," Kai replies, staring out of the window. "Do you think that it will be a problem that they know about us? It feels weird."

"It won’t be a problem but yes, it feels weird. Very weird." Julian leaves the small town behind where Marco lives, heading into the direction of their flat. He cannot wait to arrive there, to hold Kai in his arms.

However, when they drive through a thick forest, Kai suddenly grabs Julian’s thigh. "Jule, stop the car. Please, stop it!"


	8. A thick forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, sorry for the delayed update but here is the next chapter! I hope that you like it - thank you for reading, leaving kudos and comments. :-)

"Kai, are you sick?" Julian asks worriedly, slowing down the pace of his car. "You can open the window if you need some fresh air. I know that it has been too much. Our outing. Marco, Mats and their dumb idea. You should decide yourself which club you want to join!"

"There’s a parking lot, turn to the right!" Kai urges, not letting go of Julian’s thigh.

"Did you see anything?" Julian still has no clue what is up with Kai, but his concern grows with Kai now literally clutching Julian’s leg.

"Just park here, Jule. Please."  
  
Julian stops his vehicle at a parking lot that is probably for hikers. He has just switched the engine off when Kai darts out of the car.

"Do you need to throw up? Was the sushi bad?" Julian asks, stumbling into the darkness after Kai.  
  
He doesn’t come far, though, because Kai suddenly pushes him against his car. "Kai, did I do anything wr…." Julian isn’t able to finish his sentence because suddenly, there are Kai’s lips upon his own. And Kai’s tongue in his mouth.

Kai is kissing him breathless, his arms pulling Julian closer, holding him in a firm embrace.  
  
"Jule, I need you," Kai pants, taking Julian’s hand and tugging him deeper into the forest.

"What?" Julian asks, still overwhelmed from their passionate kiss and not really understanding what is going on. However, he follows Kai blindly and together they make their way through the trees and bushes.  
  
"There’s a small shelter for hikers," Kai eventually points at a wooden hut. No sooner said than done, he steps inside just to kiss Julian there another time.

"You’re not sick?" Julian asks between their ardent kisses, his hands roaming over Kai’s chest.

Kai shakes his head, blushing. "No. I guess I’m… uhm… horny?" He bites onto his lips embarrassedly.

"Did our talk with Mats and Marco turn you on?" Julian wants to know astonished.

"No. You turned me on. With standing up for me. I know that you want me to come to Dortmund like probably no other person yet still… you told them that the decision is up to me."  
  
"Of course it is," Julian says gently, stroking Kai’s face that looks so handsome in the moonlight. He kisses Kai again, holding him in an intimate embrace, their bodies pressed together. "I can feel you, babe," he whispers, clearly sensing Kai’s hardness, "what do you need. Tell me."

Kai gasps, burying his head on Julian’s shoulder. "I need your hand on me, Sunshine."

Slowly, without saying a word, Julian steps back and opens the belt of Kai’s jeans. He pulls the zipper down and caresses the bulge in Kai’s briefs, just to slip his hand inside in the next moment.  
  
"Yes," Kai breathes.

Julian moves his fingers in a way that is hopefully good for Kai. He loves to hold him in his hand, loves to hear Kai’s little moans when he indulges him. Then, after a sudden idea has hit him, Julian gently turns Kai around so that he can hold and caress him from behind. "Look," he whispers into Kai’s ear who has now full sight onto Julian’s hand.

Kai gazes down, seeing what Julian is doing to him. "Oh fuck," he mutters, growing even harder. It takes only some more strokes until Kai comes hot and wet in Julian’s hand. His knees buckle but Julian keeps him upright, peppering kisses all over Kai’s neck.

"I’m sorry that I couldn’t wait until we’re home," Kai apologizes after catching his breath. "But you’re so god damn handsome and attractive."

"Says the right person," Julian whispers, using a handkerchief to clean them up. He’s pretty aroused himself now but he doesn’t want to force Kai into anything. "Should we return to the car?" he asks.  
  
"No, we shouldn’t," Kai rasps into his ear, "we have unfinished business here." He guides Julian to the next wall, pressing him against it. His fingers crawling underneath Julian’s shirt, he teases his nipples until he moves lower.

Julian however can’t wait until Kai fumbles with his jeans, he tears his belt and zipper open himself. Kai’s hand upon his briefs, Kai’s hand inside his briefs feels like heaven. "You’re gorgeous, Sunshine," Kai praises him, his fingers still gently exploring everything that Julian has to offer.

"Kai," Julian pants, his eyes closed. They kiss deeply until Julian needs more air with Kai stroking him at all the right places. He clings to Kai when he comes, letting go of everything around them. He forgets about the evening at Marco’s house, about the forest around them, blissfully happy that he has Kai and that they are finally together.

Kai holds Julian until he can think straight again, stroking his flanks. "I guess that we might need a shower later," Kai chuckles, pointing at the mess they have caused.

"Together?" Julian whispers.

"Oh yes. Together."  
  
  
***  
  
  
During the entire drive home, Kai’s hand rests at Julian’s thigh, both as a sign for what they have done in the forest and for the night that still is in front of them.

After arriving in their flat, they magically take their time, a sharp contrast to their rather quick encounter in the hut.

Kai has only put away his shoes and jacket properly when Julian takes the collar of his shirt. "Shower, babe?" he asks, slowly unbuttoning Kai’s shirt. He’s in no hurry, after releasing one button, he first strokes over Kai’s naked skin before he takes care of the next.

"What are you doing to me, Sunshine," Kai pants, Julian finally arriving at the last button.

"Everything," Julian whispers, brushing the shirt from Kai’s shoulders. He kisses Kai, hands softly caressing Kai’s chest.

"Jule," Kai breathes aroused, "you’re completely overdressed."

Taking not less time, Kai does the same to Julian that Julian has done to him before. It’s sweet torture to feel Kai’s fingers fumbling with the buttons of his shirt, Julian thinks, but he is enjoying each and every touch until his shirt falls to the ground as well.

There are more kisses on their way to the bathroom, much more, and hands searching for belts and zippers.

Julian kneels down to strip Kai’s jeans from his hips, musing for a moment if he should simply stay in this position and…

Yet, there’s Kai, helping him to stand up and to get rid of his jeans as well. Only in their briefs anymore, they open the door to the larger bathroom.

"Do you remember all the times we showered together after training or a match," Kai asks. "I never dared to hope that we would shower only for us one day."

"I tried not to stare back then," Julian murmurs, reaching for the water tap, "but I probably didn’t succeed."

"Today you can stare as long as you want to," Kai whispers, slowly pulling his briefs down.

The sight alone is almost too much for Julian to handle. Kai is gorgeous and so clearly aroused again. With a groan, Julian hastily strips down his own briefs and turns the water in the shower cubicle on. He offers Kai a hand and pulls him underneath the warm stream, soaking up the water, the warmth - and Kai.

"Come here, babe," Julian whispers, his hands gliding over Kai’s wet skin. They face each other to share a kiss but suddenly, their hard dicks touch in between them. Simultaneously, they look down. "Do you think we…" Julian asks but before he can finish his sentence, his desire takes over. Carefully, he touches himself, spreading his fingers until he can hold Kai as well.  
  
"Oh shit, shit," Kai gasps, his eyes glued to the scenery down South.

Julian has to take a step backwards to lean against the wall of the shower cubicle but he pulls Kai with him. With the wall in his back to support him, he feels stable enough to move his hand.

The effect is overwhelming. Rubbing their hardnesses against each other, holding both of them in his hand, Julian lets out a sharp, involuntary moan. He makes another move just to nearly lose it when Kai’s dick touches his own at full length.

"I can’t…" he pants, closing his eyes.

Suddenly, there are Kai’s fingers upon his own, guiding Julian’s hand, stroking both of them.

Opening his eyes, Julian glimpses down just to see Kai’s hand, his hand and both of their dicks somewhat entangled.

"Oh fuck, Kai," Julian moans, squeezing his hand around them. He comes straight away, the sensation too much to hold back any longer. To his surprise, Kai follows him immediately. Julian wraps an arm around him, pressing their bodies together while the warm water still floats over their bodies. Kai returns the hug and they hold each other, heavy breathing filling the steamy air around them.

"That was incredible," Julian whispers after a while.

"I wonder which incredible stuff we can do in the future," Kai replies spent.

"Do you mean…?" Julian wants to know. His heartbeat that has just slowed down a bit starts to speed up again. Yet, he really doesn’t dare to utter what he thinks.

Kai chuckles. "I’m definitely not talking about doing the dishes or washing the laundry, Jule."

"Oh," Julian replies, for once at loss for words.

"Did I leave you speechless?" Kai teases him, turning the water off and grabbing a towel that he throws at Julian who still stands there like a pillar of salt. Kai chuckles and uses his towel to dry Julian off. "I don’t want my boyfriend to grab a cold," he whistles, running the towel over Julian’s body.

"Boyfriend," Julian replies, the meaning of the word slowly sinking into his mind. He closes his eyes and lets his bliss flow through him, lets his sheer joy capture every part of his body that Kai is touching.

Boyfriend, Julian thinks.  
  
Kai is my boyfriend.


	9. A brotherly talk.

After a cozy night, Julian awakes to Kai’s soft snoring. He still can’t believe that Kai is his boyfriend and he stretches himself full of bliss. Lazily, he gazes at his mobile to find out how late it is. What he reads beside the time is a message from his brother who complains that they haven’t seen each other for a while and suggests to meet soon.

"Damn it," Julian mutters, throwing his smartphone away.

"Is it still early," Kai yawns, slowly coming back to life, "or do we already have to get up?" He looks so cute with his messy hair, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, that Julian’s heart clenches.

"I need to go to the bathroom," Julian says, "I’ll be back in a minute."

Relieving himself, Julian thinks about Jannis’ message. And mostly about the question whether he should tell his family about Kai or not.

Kai winks at him when Julian returns. "You look a bit crumpled. I hope that I didn’t strain you yesterday?"

Julian sighs and manages a smile in return. "You didn’t strain me, babe." He takes another deep breath. "In fact, my brother is straining me."

"Jannis?" Kai asks, "what did he do this time?"

"He just asked me when we can see each other again," Julian admits, raising the blanket and crawling underneath it.

"Hey, your feet are cold!" Kai complains playfully.

"Then do something to warm me," Julian whispers. He really doesn’t want to think about his brothers or his teammates or the public now. He wants to think of Kai and his… gentle hands.

"Good to go again?" Kai asks mischievously but Julian has already given the answer with his entire body.

***

"Now what about Jannis," Kai wants to know after he has come down from his height. Julian is still fascinated how good Kai feels underneath his fingertips and how naturally it is to stroke and to pleasure him. This time, they have nearly ruined their sheets because they have faced each other while eager hands discovered the other one.

"We need a washing machine," Julian replies.

"I need an answer," Kai persists, rolling onto his back.

Julian closes his eyes. "I don’t know what I should tell him. About us."

"What do you want to tell him?" Kai asks, playing with Julian’s fingers.

"Preferably everything," Julian blurts out, "he’s my brother."

"Then why don’t you simply do it? Are you scared?" Kai holds Julian’s hand by now.

"No. I just don’t know if it would be… wise."

"Well, it wasn’t wise to tell Marco and Mats either, was it?" Kai laughs.

"You don’t have any problem letting the family know?" Julian asks just to make sure. "Then why don’t you come with me when I meet my brother?"

Kai pales a bit. "Okay…" he drawls but then, he nods firmly.

***

They meet Jannis in his flat. Julian is sure that his brother can already guess by looking at them what has changed between them in the meantime.

Jannis however seems to be very happy to see them. "Fortnite?" he asks, inviting them inside.

'Outing,' Julian thinks, but he plays along. Kai seems to be utterly unimpressed and of course, he wins several times in a row.

When they need a pause, Jannis asks how their week has been.

"We had a lot of training," Julian starts to walk on solid ground. "But we are prepared for the match next weekend and so is Kai, I think."

"Yeah," Kai nods, "we need some points but it’s going to be tough."

Suddenly, Julian wants it to be over and done. "We were invited at Marco’s place a few days ago," he starts carefully.

"Oh cool!" Jannis replies, "how’s his house?"

"Well… big," Julian drawls.

"Very big," Kai adds.

"Did you have dinner or what?" Jannis wants to know.

"Yes. Dinner." Julian murmurs. "With him and Mats."

Jannis chuckles pleased. "Let me guess," he continues, "they want to lure Kai to Dortmund?"

Julian stares at his brother horrified, then to Kai, then back to Jannis. "How do you know!" he exclaims.

"That’s obvious, isn’t it?" Jannis grins.

Julian buries his face in his hands. "We’re dumb, Kai," he mutters, "we’re the biggest idiots on Earth."

"Wait," Jannis retorts, "what happened there?"

Julian just shakes his head.

"We thought that they invited us for another reason," Kai says bravely.

"There’s another reason why they should want both of you to come over to Marco?" Jannis frowns.

"Something that has nothing to do with football," Kai drawls.

"I don’t get it," Jannis persists, "for me it’s crystal clear that they want to bring you to Dortmund."

"I want to bring him to Dortmund too!" Julian suddenly says, "because… because…" However, he’s not able to finish his sentence.

"Is it up to me again to reveal the truth or what," Kai mutters. He stands up and sits down on the sofa right next to Julian. "Because of this," he says and wraps an arm tightly around his boyfriend.

Jannis’ eyes grow big. "You mean… you… and him….?" He gazes from Kai to his brother. "Why did you never tell me!"

"Because we only just found out", Kai replies, tugging Julian even closer.

"Took you long enough," Jannis snorts. "I have found out months, if not years ago!"

"Wait, what," Julian gasps, "you thought that there is more than friendship between us? Why did _you_ never tell _me_!"

"Well I can tell you that I’m hungry now," Kai states. "Can we order some food? Something else than sushi, please?"

"There’s a special offer for 'Pizza Amore'… ouch!" Jannis rubs his arm where Julian has hit him.

"Don’t talk to anyone," Julian says, "except to the pizza delivery boy."

Jannis raises his hands in defense and gets his mobile. "But wait…," he comes to a conclusion, "what about that evening with Marco and Mats. Did you tell them…?"

"We thought that they invited us because they have found out about us!“ Julian exclaims, "that’s why we… outed ourselves in front of them."

"That’s hilarious!" Jannis says, ducking his head because Julian throws a cushion after him. "What did they say?"

"That they will support us. And that Kai should come to Dortmund." Julian replies.

Jannis smiles. "They are smarter than I thought."

***

During their dinner, Jannis has more questions. "When do you see each other?" he asks, biting into a slice of pizza.

Julian darts Kai a questioning look and continues when he earns a nod. "We have… a flat together."

Jannis coughs. "You have… what?"  
  
"I have bought a flat," Julian repeats, not touching his pizza at all. "And that’s where we meet."

"You’re nuts," Jannis munches, "but I like it. And I won’t ask where that flat is."

"Thank you," Julian murmurs gratefully.

"Do you want to tell mum and dad?"

"Maybe," Julian pushes his plate away.

"And what about your teammates?“ Jannis continues.

"I guess that Marco will blurt it out rather sooner than later," Julian sighs.

Kai takes his pizza. "We will wait and see," he states. "By the way, 'Pizza Amore' is delicious!"

"I told you so!" Jannis says. "You know that you have my support as well, don’t you?"

Julian nods, gazing at his watch, taking a deep breath afterwards. "I will leave Kai here in Cologne. I have to return to Dortmund, there’s training tomorrow morning." He stands up, wiping his hands clean before he realizes that he hasn’t even eaten anything.

"Some more games?" Jannis asks Kai. "I love to kick the asses of family members on Fortnite!"

A warm wave of bliss flows through Julian when he hears that. Maybe they really have a chance. Shyly, he approaches Kai and tugs him into his arms. "Sleep tight, babe," he whispers and then he takes a heart and kisses Kai goodbye, right in front of his brother.

He somehow expects a teasing comment but when he glimpses at Jannis, he sees that his eyes are watery. "I wish you all the luck in the world, big bro," he murmurs, placing a wet peck on Julian’s cheek.


	10. A breathless confession.

Julian is excited, confused and everything together when he drives to Dortmund, leaving Kai behind with his brother. He speeds up on the highway, thinking about everything that has happened during the last days.

A sudden rush of confidence captures him while he travels through the night, soft music surrounding him.

Jannis supports them. Marco and Mats support them. And most of all: Kai is his boyfriend.

Driving for almost half an hour straight into the direction of Dortmund, Julian makes another decision. He smiles when he takes the next exit of the highway, heading to their flat.

Heading to their home.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Julian doesn’t care that he has to get up early the next morning to make it in time for the next training session in Dortmund. He texts Kai before he gets up, still laying in their bed.

_I stayed in our flat,_ he writes, _the bed still smells of you._

To his surprise, Kai answers immediately. _Why didn’t you say anything!_ Kai replies. _I would have come too,_ he adds ambiguously. 

_You should focus on your next match, babe. And then we’ll meet again here._

_You bet we do!_ Kai texts and Julian sighs contentedly. He’s quite sure that Kai will have a good match at the weekend, he simply has to. He’s never worried about his own performance, trusting his skills even when he has a bad phase, but he knows that Kai goes through such a phase for the first time in his career.  
  
After he has showered, Julian leaves the flat, eager to spend carefree hours with Kai here as soon as possible.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Dortmund’s match goes well to say the least. Julian scores, hitting the ball into the net after a beautiful, elegant move. Because they have played on a Friday evening, Julian is quite sure that Kai has watched him on TV.

Switching on his mobile after he comes into the locker room, Julian grins when he sees Kai’s message. _You were amazing. You deserve a reward!_

_Yes, I think I do, _Julian replies, still grinning. _But just wait until you have played your match tomorrow,_ he adds in a second message, carefully hiding his mobile from his teammates. Only Mats and Marco send him knowing gazes, gazes he answers with a wink.

Briefly, Julian muses if he should drive to their flat but he decides to stay in Dortmund to watch Leverkusen’s match there the next day. Then, he would drive to their flat to greet Kai there. At least that’s his plan.

However, when he watches Kai play the next day, he immediately knows that this plan won’t work.

He knows it when he sees Kai laying on the ground, his face screwed up in pain.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
_Kai, are you fine?_ Julian texts when he sees that Kai gets up to his feet again, but is clearly limping. He knows that his boyfriend cannot see the message right now. Yet, he feels so helpless that he has to do something.

_Answer me if you can_, he adds, fingers trembling.

He watches the slow motion of the moment in which Kai’s injury has happened, groaning himself when Kai’s hand darts to his thigh. Probably torn muscle fibers, the commentator states but Julian wouldn’t need that confirmation to see what injury Kai has picked up. "Fuck!" he shouts, throwing the remote control to the side when Kai leaves the pitch and limps into the locker room, assisted by Leverkusen’s physiotherapist. Then, he randomly throws some clothes into his bag, darts to the underground parking, and drives to their flat, ready to even drive to Leverkusen or to Köln if he would be needed there.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
He tries to call Kai several times from the car but his boyfriend doesn’t answer. Julian can’t count the times he insults other drivers on the highway just to get rid of his frustration.

Kai is injured. For the first time in his career.

Eventually, Julian reaches their flat, parking his car there. He’s unsure if he should drive to Leverkusen to pick Kai up there. Would he even be able to drive a car himself with his injured thigh?

Julian decides to bring his bag into their flat first, trying to call Kai from there another time. He doesn’t get an reply either, but after some minutes, Kai texts him.

_I’m okay_, he writes,_ I will be out for some weeks but the treatment starts only in two days. I’ll be on my way to our flat as soon as I’m out of the hospital._

_Are you even able to drive?_ Julian replies,_ I can pick you up._

_It’s the left leg and I have an automatic gear_, Kai replies._ Just warm up the couch for me.  
  
  
  
_***  
  
  
  
Julian has prepared everything by the time that Kai arrives. The living room is comfortably heated, there’s food in the fridge and a cozy blanket on the sofa.

However, Julian is not prepared how much it hurts to see the man he loves in pain.

Kai looks strained when he opens the door, trying to hide the ache he must still feel in his leg. "Hey," he greets Julian, sighing deeply when he embraces him.

Julian places a careful, tender kiss on Kai’s lips, but guides him to the couch afterwards. "Come on, you should lay down," he says, his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"You look beautiful when you’re worried," Kai smiles, trying to find a comfortable position on the sofa. "Especially your eyebrows."

"My eyebrows?" Julian asks perplexed, spreading the blanket over Kai.

"Yes. Here." Kai whispers, pulling Julian closer so that he can travel over his eyebrows with his fingertip, sending shivers down Julian’s spine.

They kiss afterwards, Julian being cautious not to crash Kai with his weight. "Does it hurt?" he mutters against Kai’s lips, not daring to touch Kai’s injured leg.

"Not too bad," Kai replies, "especially when you are distracting me from the pain."

"I’m not sure if I can really touch you," Julian says, "I don’t want to hurt you."

Kai chuckles. "Come on, let’s move to our bed. I can show you there how you can touch me without causing me pain."

Julian swallows and helps Kai to get to his feet. "Are you sure?" he asks, pointing at Kai’s leg. "I don’t want to…"

Kai silences him with a fierce kiss. "I just have an injured leg, Sunshine. The rest of my body is perfectly fine."

Julian can feel the effect of Kai’s words in his groin, his dick twitching in interest. "Okay," he whispers, "on one condition: You’re going to let me do the work."

"Deal," Kai whispers, balancing on one leg, his hands wrapped tightly around Julian’s waist.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Lay down, babe," Julian breathes, guiding Kai to their bed.

"Help me to get rid of my sweatpants," Kai begs him, sitting on the edge of the bed. Julian kneels down in front of him, tugging at the waistband. Carefully, Kai leans back and lets Julian strip down his pants, revealing a tight bandage around his thigh.

"Oh shit, Kai, that looks bad," Julian mutters, trying hard not to come too close to Kai’s injured thigh.

"That’s nothing," Kai tries to pretend. He fumbles with the bandage, unwinding it.

"Stop it!" Julian exclaims, trying to prevent Kai from carrying on.  
  
"Relax. I’m allowed to, the physio said I can remove the bandage once the leg is resting."

Julian shakes his head. "Then let me help you at least." With shaking fingers, he releases the bandage, trying to be as gentle as possible.

Kai hums in approval. "You could be a doctor, Jule," he states. "Can you like… stroke me a little bit?"

"Your injured leg? With my clumsy fingers?" Julian replies horrified. The mere thought of touching Kai where he’s hurting makes him sick.

Kai crawls onto the mattress, finding a comfortable place there. "As I said earlier, you won’t hurt me. Just try it. Please."

Staring at Kai’s thigh, Julian shakes his head before he has an idea. "Wait a second," he murmurs, disappearing into his bathroom, finding a bottle of massage oil there. He returns to Kai, hiding the bottle in his hands.

"What do you have there?" Kai asks with curiosity.

Julian drawls. "We don’t have to use it if you think that it is cheesy or inappropriate…“, he states, revealing the bottle.

"Oh," Kai whispers, staring at the liquid.

Julian lets out a squeal. "Shit, Kai, I didn’t mean to… it’s meant for your _leg_!"

Kai grins. "I know Jule. It’s just… I have a thing for your hands. And I can’t wait to feel them upon me."

"You have what?" Julian is baffled.

"Your hands. Your fingers. I love to have them on my body," Kai admits, blushing. "Now open that damn bottle, don’t make me wait."

"Of… course." Julian hastens to pour the oil into his hands, nearly spilling the content onto the sheets.

"We need a washing machine, Jule," Kai says, immediately followed by a deep growl because Julian has placed his fingers upon Kai’s healthy thigh.

"Did I hurt you? I thought it is the other leg?" Julian draws his hands back.

"You’re such a dork sometimes," Kai whispers, eyes closed. "Do that again. And again. Please."

Softly, Julian places his hands upon Kai’s skin again, gliding over his thigh. He can feel Kai’s muscles underneath his fingertips, his sensitive skin. And soon, he can see a bulge in Kai’s briefs.

Taking a heart, Julian moves to Kai’s injured leg, touching his thigh light as a feather. Kai flinches nevertheless and Julian raises his hands in apology.

"Please. Jule," Kai begs.

"I can’t harm you," Julian replies. He looks Kai deep in the eyes. "But there’s something that is softer than my fingers."

He doesn’t wait for Kai’s reaction, slowly crawling deeper. Very much deeper.

"Sunshine," he hears Kai’s muffled moan when he reaches out for him with his tongue, licking his thigh, caressing him with his mouth. Kai tastes so good, so promising, and Julian doesn’t stop, traveling over Kai’s skin. He can sense Kai’s dick twitching and grabs the waistband of his briefs, tugging them down.

Kai lets out another groan. Julian catches his gaze, so full of arousal and insecurity at the same time. Then, he lowers his head. Kai’s dick is beautiful and gorgeous and so very hard.

At first, Julian doesn’t know how or where to start but then he lets his instincts guide him. Slowly, he licks over Kai’s dick, over the base and the length, upwards to the tip.

Kai’s hands search for something to hold on to, his chest heaving up and down heavily. "Jule," he moans, "you…" Whatever he wants to say is forgotten when Julian wraps his lips around Kai’s dick.

It feels unfamiliar to sense and taste Kai like this, but it’s so good. So good that Julian tightens his lips and moves them down, as far as he can go, before he travels upwards again. He’s quite sure that he’s acting awkwardly because he has never done this before.

Kai wriggles on the sheets, his dick pulsing. Julian can hear his own name, urgently moaned. At first he doesn’t listen, too focussed on his task of pleasuring his boyfriend with the little skills that he has.

He only really hears Kai when he stammers more words. "Jule, I’m close. So close."

Julian gazes up to Kai just to see him fall apart. He sucks at his dick and literally rips the orgasm from Kai. In deep wonder, Julian feels Kai’s height, feels everything, his pulsing dick and of course his come. Without thinking he swallows it down, Kai’s sobs and moans still in his ears.

He needs a moment to get himself together but when he crawls back to lay right next to Kai, Julian has to wipe a tear from Kai's eye. "Jule?" Kai pants. "You’re the most wonderful being in the universe. How do I even deserve you."

Julian’s cheeks turn pink. "Did you like it?"

Kai ruffles Julian’s hair. "And how. That was… so incredibly good. I can’t wait to do the same for you."

"You don’t have to," Julian whispers but his body betrays him, his dick pressed hard against Kai’s healthy leg.

"I know," Kai replies, his hand wandering underneath the blanket and straight into Julian’s pants. "But I want to." Slowly, he starts to get Julian off. "And Jule?" he asks, not stopping the movements of his hand.

"Yes!!!" Julian’s answer comes as a moan.

"Do you think…" Kai continues, his fingers indulging Julian where he needs it so much.

„What? Kai!" Julian gasps, hoping that it is enough of an encouragement for Kai to go on.

Kai is caressing Julian in earnest now but he still has the energy to finish his sentence. "Do you think we can sleep with each other one day?"

Processing the meaning of Kai’s question in his mind, Julian immediately loses it, coming right over Kai’s fingers. He shouts "yes!" louder than he wanted to but he couldn’t care less. He feels the fire burning in his body, realizing that it isn’t quenched yet.

"Yes, I think so, babe," he adds breathlessly when he is able to speak again. "If you want to. Because I clearly do."


	11. An important conversation.

"I want that too, Sunshine. We just need some time, don’t we?" Kai whispers.

"We won’t rush things," Julian replies, stroking Kai gently. "This is all new to me too. But how do you imagine our… first time?" he adds sheepishly. Julian is dizzy when he only thinks about it, and he wants to hear Kai’s wishes to make everything perfect for him. Suddenly, the idea of sleeping with Kai becomes real, something Julian has only dared to dream of before. He thinks back to the countless nights in which he has stroked himself to the thought of having Kai so close.

Seeing how Kai blushes, Julian turns towards him, taking his face into his hands. "You don’t have to be embarrassed. We have to talk about it. I want to make your first time good."

Kai nods but he still doesn’t say anything so Julian decides to start, his voice hoarse. "I want to do it here. In our flat," he begins. "And in your bed."

Kai chuckles. "That’s easy because yours is still full of feathers. And it has to be dark outside. I don’t know why… but I really want to spend a night with you then, in the literal sense of the meaning."

"Of course!" Julian adds, his dick that was soft a minute ago slowly starting to harden again. "We could go for a walk before we… eh… go to bed, enjoying the fresh air outside."

"You want to go on a walk voluntarily?" Kai snickers.

"Just to take a shower with you afterwards," Julian admits. "Or maybe a bath."

"It has to be a bath!" Kai exclaims. Julian can see - and sense - that their talk has an effect on Kai too. "A foam bath with a lot of bubbles", Kai fancies.

"Agreed!" Julian kisses Kai, a soft peck at first, but soon their tongues get involved.

"Jule," Kai eventually mutters, "after the bath… I want to…," he drawls. "Promise me not to laugh!"

"I promise," Julian whispers, rubbing his thumb over Kai’s stubble.

Kai takes a deep breath. "I want to dance with you."

Julian is surprised to say the least. "You are aware that I can’t dance?" He glimpses down at his feet and wiggles his toes. "I don’t want to hurt you, babe."

Kai shakes his head. "Not dancing like in a club or so. Just you… and me. And some soft music. And maybe candles."

"I see. We will dance," Julian takes Kai’s hand. "And then we’ll slowly move to the bed."

"Do we wear clothes?" Kai whispers, burying his head at Julian’s shoulder.

"Some briefs and a shirt maybe after the bath?" Julian suggests. "It’s more comfortable for the dancing part."

"And for the undressing part," Kai adds.

"So you’re going to undress me?" Julian is half-hard by now.

"Yes. Slowly. Thoroughly. And I will…" Kai blushes.

"What are you going to do?" Julian breathes, "tell me."

"My mouth… on you," is all that Kai says and it is enough to make Julian moan.

"Fuck, Kai," he mutters, his dick hard and aching.

"But I also want to use that massage oil," Kai continues, a bit out of breath. "We need some… stuff anyways… To make it work, I mean."

"Are you talking about lube?" Julian says as calmly as he is able to in this situation.

Kai just nods.

"I will buy some." Julian feels that he should take over the responsibility.

Staring into the air, Kai avoids his gaze. "You don’t have to," he eventually says.

Julian frowns. "Why not?"

"Because I already have bought some," Kai murmurs.

"You did what?!" Julian exclaims, "wait, when? And for whom?"  
  
"When I moved in here," Kai says, "I know that it is dumb but I really hoped that you got the flat for a reason and that we would need… not only the pans and the pots that I bought!"

Julian is silent. "I’m speechless," he replies after a while.

"Yeah, I noticed."

"So we have lube here?" Julian continues after a while, just to make sure. Just to make _really_ sure.

"We have", Kai confirms. "And condoms."

"Fucking hell!" Julian shouts, arousal shooting through his every nerve. "That means… that means… that you hoped that we would come closer?!"

"Of course I did!" Kai admits. "I hoped that for a very long time, to be precise."

"I’m an idiot," Julian whispers.

"A handsome idiot," Kai breathes, kissing Julian deeply. "And a horny idiot?" he adds after his hand has moved to Julian’s groin.

"Yes. Yes!" Julian groans, savoring Kai’s fingers on him.

"Do you think we need the condoms, when we’re… doing it," Kai asks, thumb grazing over Julian’s sensitive skin down South.

"We’re tested, aren’t we," Julian pants with effort because Kai is improving his hand-job skills in record time, "so it depends whether you want to… _oh fuck, Kai_… whether you want to be inside me with or without something."

Kai continues to stroke Julian for some seconds before he suddenly pauses. "Pardon me?" he asks, clearly confused.

"Don’t stop, babe," Julian begs, yet to no avail.

"Did you just suggest…" Kai muses aloud.

"…that you should go on? Yes, yes, I did!" Julian gasps. His dick twitches helplessly because Julian is missing Kai’s touches and he really needs Kai’s hand back on him. Now.

"I thought…" Kai tries again.

"Please, babe," Julian whimpers, "I’ll answer your every question if you just touch me!"

Finally, Kai has pity on him, lazily taking Julian’s dick in his hand. "Jule," Kai begins. "did I understand you right? You think that I… should use the condom? If we use one? But that means… that means…"

"…that you are going to fuck me, yes!" Julian bites onto his lips, the thought of having Kai deep inside adding to the pleasure of Kai’s hand on him.

"I thought that we would do it the other way round first," Kai mutters. The thought does nothing to calm Julian down either and he tries to thrust into Kai’s hand to finally find his release. "Whenever I thought about sleeping with you, it was always you… on top of me." Kai adds.

Julian closes his eyes, thinking of laying on top of Kai, thinking of pushing inside him - and he comes straight away. He can sense that Kai kisses him but he’s too blissed-out to respond to the kiss, just panting against Kai’s soft lips.

"I’m relieved that this thought had the same effect on you that it always had on me," Kai grins.

"Do you want to tell me," Julian gasps spent, "that you… got yourself off at the thought of us… having sex?"

"Maybe?" Kai replies innocently.

With a whimper, Julian half-heartedly tries to clean the traces of his height before he gives up, searching for Kai’s hard dick instead.

"I got off to the thought of us having sex too," he whispers, fingers wrapped around Kai.

Kai lets out a slight groan, moving closer towards Julian.

"I want you to be my first," Julian whispers, moving his hand. "I want to feel you, I want everything of you."

Kai moans, his dick growing even harder.

"And I want to see you when we do it," Julian adds breathlessly, the words coming out of his mouth without thinking. "I want you on top of me, your skin touching mine. And I want to… feel you deep inside me."

Kai comes hard with Julian’s last words, silently, but vigorously. He trembles in Julian’s arms, his ruffled hair tickling Julian’s skin.

"I can’t believe that we just had this talk," Kai mutters, holding Julian tightly.

"I can’t believe that you bought lube and condoms!" Julian replies. "By the way, what about your thigh? Is it still hurting?"

"I don’t care about my leg," Kai says, snuggling against Julian. "All I care about is you."


	12. A special match.

The next morning, Kai returns to the hospital for a closer examination of his leg. An hour later, Julian receives a message from him.

_It’s worse than we thought at first. I’m out for the national team matches._

Julian sighs deeply. He has looked forward to seeing Kai for a few days in a row and he feels disappointed now.

_Shit,_ he texts back, _but you really should take a rest and let your thigh heal._

_I wanted to go to those matches with you!!!_ Kai is clearly miserable too.

_I know, babe. But we have plenty of time. And you don’t have to deal with Marco’s curiosity then._

_And his clumsy tries to lure me to Dortmund!_

Julian chuckles. _Can we see each other before I have to leave?_

_You bet we can._

***

Their meeting before Julian has to join the national team is shorter than they have planned, due to Kai’s rehab schedule and Julian’s training plan. They only have some hours in their flat before Julian has to leave.

To Julian’s surprise, they just end up on the sofa, snuggling with each other. And somehow, it is even more intimate than sex. Julian strokes Kai’s thigh while they talk about the upcoming matches and Kai’s rehab. In between, they trade kisses and little pecks.

"A week until we can meet again?" Julian asks, staring at the ceiling.

Kai nods. "Do me a favour in the meantime," he adds.

Julian raises his eyebrows.

"Don’t get injured too."

"Naah, I won’t. Löw doesn’t like us Dortmund players anyways. Maybe he won’t even let me play."

"As if!" Kai snorts. "He’s your fan."

"Then why have I never noticed that?" Julian sits up and ruffles Kai’s hair. "And you should work hard in rehab. I need you fit when I return."

Kai looks at Julian, straight into his soul. "Why?" he asks, barely a whisper.

"Because of baths, candles - and a dance."

***

The national team meets in Munich of all places, and Julian runs straight into Marco, even before they arrive in the hotel. He tries to set up a stern face but Marco doesn’t seem to care. Of course he doesn’t.

"Hey, little one!" he greets Julian which is still ridiculous. "How are you doing?"

"Fine." Julian doesn’t want to get engaged into a conversation.

"But Kai isn’t so well, huh?" At least Marco doesn’t beat around the bush.

"He’s okay," Julian gives away. "The break will do him good."

Marco lowers his voice. "Did you talk with him… about Dortmund?"

"No, should I?"  
  
Marco shows a smug grin. "Ah, I see. You have better things to do!"

"Yeah, like playing football!" Julian snaps.

"Imagine you could play football with Kai every day again," Marco tries.

Julian steps closer until his face almost touches Marco’s. "Imagine what I can do with Kai _besides playing football_."

Then he leaves, Marco’s mouth still hanging open while Julian walks away.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
The first training session with the national team goes well and Julian enjoys to have his friends from the other clubs around him. But of course he misses Kai, especially with the perplexed gazes Marco is still sending into his direction.

After dinner, Julian goes straight to his room, texting Kai.

_Marco asks when you are going to join Dortmund,_ he writes.

Kai replies immediately. _Is it that bad?_

_Worse._ Julian kicks away the shoes from his feet.

_Can I do something to cheer you up?_

_You already did. How’s your thigh?_

_It still hurts but it’s getting better._

_I’ll take care of you when I’m back._

_I hope that you do!_

_I miss you, babe._ Julian writes._ Are you going to watch me on TV when we play our first match?_

_Yes._ Kai replies but Julian can see that he still types_. I will be alone then_, Kai adds before he sends a third message. _Alone in our flat._

_Do you want to tell me…_ Julian’s throat runs dry.

_That I am going to watch you on TV, yes._

_That’s not what I meant…_

_What did you mean?_

Julian’s fingers fly over the letters. _Are you going to wear… a lot of clothes?_

_No, I don’t think so. I never wear many clothes in bed._

_I know!_ Julian writes. He hesitates because he doesn’t know how to ask his next question. It turns out that Kai answers him without asking.

_Score for me Sunshine. I want to imagine that my hand is yours afterwards._

_Shit Kai, I’ll try my best. I promise!_

Julian sleeps soundly this night, dreaming of Kai, dreaming of the match, dreaming of them being together again.

Two days later, he hits the ball into the net, leading Germany’s national team to a well-deserved victory.


	13. A heartfelt wish.

As soon as Julian is in his hotel room after the match, away from the nosy eyes and ears of his teammates, he texts Kai.

_Did you see me score, babe?_

He closes his eyes, waiting for Kai’s reply, thinking what Kai probably has done after his goal.

_Of course I did. You were amazing._

Julian smiles, sinking down on his bed. _Are you in our flat?_

_I’m at home, yes._

Reading that Kai calls their flat his home warms Julian’s heart._ I wish I could be there with you,_ he replies.

_Soon, Sunshine. Very soon._

Julian doesn’t know if Kai means that they will see each other soon or that they would do… things then. But both thoughts do nothing to stop his raising arousal. He’s still full of adrenaline from the match and from his goal. And from the image of Kai in his mind.

_Did you have a good time watching the match?_ he texts carefully.

_Yeah. Especially after your goal!_

A hot wave of desire shoots through Julian’s body. _What did you do then?_ he wants to know.

_I imagined that you are laying beside me, touching me._

Julian throws his mobile away and lets Kai’s text sink in. Slowly, his hand slides into his pants and briefs, stroking himself, until his mobile beeps again.

_I know what you are doing :)_

Julian suppresses a moan and bites onto his lips instead, his hand now fully buried in his briefs. He still can see his smartphone and Kai’s next message in the display.

_When we’re back together, I will do that for you. And much more._

Julian is not able to reply, his breath ragged by now. He can see Kai so clearly, laying in their bed, a cheeky smile upon his face. He’s only a little bit surprised but very turned-on when he reads Kai’s next message.

_Come for me, Sunshine.  
  
  
  
_***  
  
  
  
Julian has barely recovered from his height when someone knocks at his door. "Jule!" he hears an all-too familiar voice.

"No!" Julian shouts angrily, wiping his hand clean. Damn it, he just wanted to savor his post-orgasmic bliss. Was that too much to ask for?

"Jule, come on, I know that you are here."

"Give me a minute for fuck’s sake!" Julian complains, darting to the toilet to wash his hands. He glimpses down at himself and brings his pants back into order before he runs his fingers through his hair.

"Can I come in?" his visitor shouts from the outside.

Fuming with rage, Julian tears the door to his room open.

"What do you want from me!" he hisses straight into Marco’s face. "Do you even know how late it is!"

Marco gazes at his watch, clearly not impressed. "Yes. I do. Can I come in now?"

Julian steps back and invites Marco inside. "Before you wake all the other guests in the hotel up…" he mutters. "Now what is it that makes you disturb me right after a straining match?"

Marco raises his eyebrows and stares at Julian’s bed before he frowns and sits down. "It’s about…" he starts but Julian doesn’t let him finish his sentence.  
  
"Let me guess, it’s about Kai," Julian answers. "You have another idea to lure him to Dortmund. Why are you so obsessed with him? For the records: He is _my_ boyfriend!" Julian crosses his arms in front of his chest.

"I know that, little one," Marco says, only to feed Julian’s anger. "But I indeed have an idea."

"Another party at your house?" Julian replies.

"Of course not, that was dumb," Marco admits. "But it has to do something with a house, yes."

Julian tilts his head to the side and waits for Marco to continue.

"I own a big house in Dortmund that is currently rented, but it will be available in summer. You could live there together, like in a shared flat. Nobody would have a suspicion that you are more than friends."

Marco beams at Julian and all of a sudden, Julian has to laugh. "You really want to have him with us, don’t you?" Marco nods eagerly.

"Well you should come up with something better then," Julian states.

"Why?" At first, Marco is clueless but he gets the point surprisingly fast. "Do you want to tell me… that you a_lready live together?_" His eyes are big now and he can’t avert his gaze from his teammate.

Julian just winks at Marco before he stands up. "I need to catch some sleep," he pretends, yawning. "But I promise you that I will talk to Kai." He hugs Marco and pats his shoulders, holding him back when he is just about to leave. "And Marco?" Julian says quietly, finally saying what is on his mind for weeks now. "I want him in Dortmund too."  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Julian grabs his mobile after Marco has left, seeing several messages from Kai in the meantime. Instead of texting him back, he decides to call him.

"What took you so long?" Kai replies after only a few seconds, half amused, half alarmed.

"Marco was here," Julian answers.

There’s silence afterwards until Kai clears his throat. "You don’t want to imply that he… helped you with your… uhm… task?" Kai sounds stressed and also sad.

"Which task?" Julian asks before he understands. "Oh, shit, shit, Kai, no!" He feels the blood coloring his cheeks. "He came later. After I came, to be precise."

Kai chuckles pleased at the other end of the line. "Let’s talk about Marco’s persistence later. What about your… task?"

"It was good," Julian starts. "Like in ‚very good‘. I imagined… well."

"I want to hear it," Kai replies seductively. "All of it."

Julian closes his eyes. "I imagined our first time," he admits. "How you will feel."

"I imagined the same. Do you think that I can… make it good for you?"

Julian smiles. "Of course. I have no doubts about it."

"Fine." Kai is clearly satisfied for now, in the double sense of the meaning. "And what about Marco? Did he annoy you again?"

"He knocked at my door shortly after… uhm… I had finished. He came up with one of his fabulous ideas." Julian rubs his temple. "He has a huge house in Dortmund that he wants to rent to me. To us. So that we can live together."

"He’s a bit late for that," Kai grins, "someone had that idea already."

"I think I told him accidentally about our flat," Julian answers contritely. "Or better: He understood without words."

"He’s cleverer than I thought!"

"He really wants you to join Dortmund," Julian says before he takes a heart. "And I want that too, babe."


	14. An unexpected visitor.

"Jule, I…," Kai replies but Julian interrupts him.

"You don’t have to say anything. I’m sorry. I didn’t want to put pressure on you too."

"It’s good that you told me," Kai says, "I need to know that. But now go to sleep. And dream of me." 

"I will," Julian promises, hesitating. There’s another sentence on his lips, yet, he doesn’t dare to utter it.

***

The next training session with the national team goes by smoothly. Julian counts the days when he will be reunited with Kai but he also enjoys being on the pitch with Germany’s best players. 

After dinner he makes himself comfortable in his bed when he hears another knock at his door. 

"Damn it Marco, when will you finally leave me be!" Julian shouts into the direction of the hallway. 

"Uhm, I’m not Marco," he hears another voice from outside. Julian recognizes his visitor and jumps from the bed, opening the door. 

"Manu?" he says surprised because he would not have awaited their captain of all people. They barely have contact besides their training and team sessions. 

"Hey Jule, can I come in?" Manuel asks. 

Although Julian is quite tall he still has to gaze upwards to their goalie. "Yes," Julian makes way for him. 

"I just wanted to ask how Kai is doing," Manuel starts. "And you of course." 

"We’re both fine," Julian says, "thank you for asking." He appreciates Manuel’s style of captaincy, his care for the players, without ever being pushy. 

"Tell Kai that we’re happy when he’s back," Manuel adds, "we need him for the upcoming European Championship. We need both of you." 

"I will tell him," Julian replies, starting to suspect that their captain came here for another reason. "Did Marco talk to you?" he asks carefully. 

Manuel looks at him. "No, should he?" 

Julian shakes his head before he takes a heart, revealing at least the innocent part of the truth. "Marco hopes that Kai comes to Dortmund," he states. 

Manuel doesn’t seem to be surprised. "I thought so," he replies, "and what do you want?"

"Does that even matter?" Julian answers. 

"More than you might know, Jule." 

***

Manuel leaves Julian after they have talked about their opponents and about their team but Julian still has the feeling that their captain knows everything. About Kai and him. Their love. Out of the blue, he calls Kai. 

"Kai, are we that obvious?" he asks without further ado when his boyfriend is at the other end of the line. 

"Wait," Kai replies confused, "what happened?" 

"Manu was here and we had a strange talk about you." 

"Is your room the Grand Central Station or what," Kai mutters, "if he wants something from me, he should call me directly." 

"I think he rather wanted something from me," Julian means. "It’s complicated." 

Quickly, he tells Kai about his conversation with Manuel. 

"He’s in the picture or he suspects something," Kai states. "But by the way, he is right."

"Right with what?" Julian has lost track in the meantime. 

There’s silence until Kai replies, quoting their captain. "What you want matters more than you might know, Sunshine." 

***

Julian lives through the remaining training days and the last match in a haze, thinking about Kai’s words almost constantly. 

Is there really a chance that Kai might join Dortmund next season? He doesn’t even dare to hope. Kai can go anywhere, to Bayern or abroad. Every team would want to have him. 

Julian forbids himself strictly to think further about that possibility. The thought alone that they could play football together is more than enough. 

When he leaves the national team, about to head straight to their flat, he makes a promise to himself. He won’t talk to Kai about his move unless Kai starts the conversation. He won’t build up any pressure. 

He will just be there.


	15. An intense reunion.

"Kai! Kai, I’m back!" Julian tries to throw everything away all at once, his bag, his jacket, his shoes. His longing for Kai is almost unbearable, and breathing in Kai’s scent in their flat doesn’t help either. He needs to see Kai, he needs to hold and to feel him. Now.

"Kai, babe, where are you?" Julian glimpses into their living room, but Kai isn’t there. He’s not in the kitchen. And their bedroom is empty too.

"Kai?" Julian asks again, finally realizing that his boyfriend isn’t there. Frustrated, he sits down onto their sofa, looking at his watch. He has arrived an hour earlier than planned. Not telling Kai because he wanted to surprise him was probably a mistake.

_"I’m in our flat,"_ Julian texts to Kai, _"I can hardly wait to see you."_

Hoping that Kai replies or shows up, Julian paces though their flat. He still can’t believe that he really did this. That they did this. Living together. Loving each other.

And soon they will…. Julian inhales a shaky breath, looking at their bed. He closes his eyes and thinks of Kai slowly undressing him there, caressing and holding him.

Before Julian gets lost in that thought, he hears Kai entering their flat. The sound of the door being opened lets his heartbeat pace up in a second.

"Babe, I’m here!" he shouts, leaving their bedroom, heading to the hallway - and straight into Kai’s arms.

***

Kissing Kai after their long time of separation feels incredible. Kai still stands in the hallway, his shopping bags thrown to the ground, but Julian has only eyes for him, not for the mess around them.

"I missed you," he breathes before he kisses Kai another time, gently but thoroughly, exploring and claiming him again. "How is your leg?"

"Fine," Kai whispers and it sounds like an answer to Julian’s question and like a comment to their kisses alltogether.

Finally, Julian glimpses down at the bags that Kai has dropped. Some items have fallen out. "What did you buy?" he asks stunned, arms still wrapped around Kai’s slim body because he really doesn’t want to let go of him.

"Some things," Kai drawls.  
  
"Which things," Julian rasps, his eyed glued to a special bottle. "I thought we already have lube here."

Kai’s cheeks turn pink. "That’s… uhm… massage oil. A proper one."

Julian bends down and picks the bottle up, opening it afterwards to take in the scent. The smell is enticing, to say the least. "We should try it, babe," he whispers.

They don’t need a single word to take each others hands, going over to their bedroom, fingers entangled. Julian’s hands wander underneath Kai’s shirt, stroking his soft, warm skin, as soon as they are there.

"How I missed to feel you," he whispers, gently pulling the shirt over Kai’s head.

"I missed you too, Sunshine." Kai tugs at Julian’s shirt, hugging him when both of their chests are bare.

Standing in front of their bed, embracing each other, Julian’s hands move lower until he can stroke Kai’s butt through his jeans. Kai’s soft moan encourages him to open the belt of his trousers. "You’re already hard for me," he breathes, caressing the bulge in Kai’s briefs.

Kai presses their lips together as an answer, his hands fumbling with Julian’s belt as well. In the end, they lose their patience, undressing their trousers and briefs and socks in a haze.

"You’re so beautiful when you are naked," Julian whispers, lips on Kai’s chest, indulging his nipples.

"Only when I’m naked…?" Kai gasps, accompanied by a loud moan.

"Of course not," Julian replies, searching for the bottle they have brought with them. He pours a good amount of the liquid into his hands, warming it, before he touches Kai’s thighs. "Oh fuck, Jule," Kai moans, "I wanted to try that stuff on you first, but…" He cannot finish his sentence with Julian stroking long lines up and down his legs.

"But what?" Julian asks, coming closer to Kai’s groin but never touching his dick.

"But now you have to go on," Kai begs. "Although this might be over very soon."

"Oh, I don’t think so," Julian says, stroking Kai’s belly. He still ignores Kai’s hard dick, taking care of his chest instead. His thumb brushes over Kai’s nipples before he licks them, slowly and carefully.

"Your… hand," Kai stammers, "Jule, please!"

"My hand?" Julian replies innocently. "Or rather my mouth?"

"Fuck!" Kai groans, gazing downwards.

Julian doesn’t wait for an answer, he kisses his way from Kai’s knees to his thighs and back, savoring the little noises Kai lets out.

"I have dreamed to make you come," Julian whispers against Kai’s hot skin, seeing how Kai clutches the blanket after this confession.  
  
Kai’s harsh breathing fills the room, choked sobs in between, but when Julian finally kisses his dick, he cries out loudly. Kai tastes of pure sex, Julian thinks, licking his smooth skin. He tries to remember how he has indulged Kai the last time, taking him completely into his mouth, gently sucking at him.

"Jule, I…" Kai gasps before he lets go and gives in. "Yes, just like that," Kai murmurs, every breath a moan now.

Julian tries to take as much of Kai as possible while still making good use of his tongue. It is so arousing to feel Kai like this, he muses, before he has another idea, releasing Kai and searching for the bottle.

"You can’t leave me like this!" Kai whimpers when he realizes that Julian’s lips are gone.

"Shhh," Julian whispers, moisturizing his fingers with the oil. Quickly, he takes Kai’s dick into his mouth again, using his fingers to stroke his balls and the sensitive skin underneath them.

"What are you doing… Jule!!!" Kai gasps.

Julian pays attention to the signs that Kai is giving him. He can feel that Kai is close, so very close. When Kai’s muscles tighten, he doesn’t think twice and pushes his wet finger inside.

"Julian!" Kai screams, using his full name. He comes hard and longer than ever before, straight into Julian’s mouth. Julian lets his finger where it is, stunned about the tightness and the warmth that Kai’s body is offering. Eventually, he pulls his digit out and takes Kai into his arms.

There’s an awkward silence afterwards and Julian fears that he has gone too far. "Are you okay?" he asks.

"I… never thought… that I would… uhm… like that so much," Kai admits after a while.

"Really?" Julian is amazed.

"Uhm… yes." Kai’s cheeks are rosy. "I liked it _very_ much."

"Do you think that I will like it too?" Julian whispers.

"Jule!" Kai pants, "do you want to tell me…." At first Kai looks at him with confusion and then with love. "Hand me the bottle."

They exchange a meaningful gaze when Kai takes the bottle out of Julian’s hands. But to Julian’s surprise, Kai puts it to the side at first.

"Tell me when I’m too clumsy," Kai whispers before he crawls lower, so low that he can kiss Julian’s belly.

"Kai… babe…" Julian stammers, understanding what his boyfriend has in mind. Yet, nothing has prepared him for the moment when Kai’s full lips touch his dick for the very first time.

He nearly jumps upwards and lets out a moan that is so loud that it rings in his own ears.

This is pure heaven, sheer and utter bliss.

Kai’s lips wander over Julian’s dick that is rock-hard. Out of the blue, his tongue caresses Julian too. "Kai!" Julian groans, already close to coming. He can’t hold back, not with Kai’s warm, soft lips all over his dick. "That’s good, Kai, so good," he whispers aroused.

He’s half excited and half nervous when Kai finally takes the bottle to lube his fingers up. At first, he holds his breath when he feels Kai where has never felt anybody else before. Yet, he lets go when Kai starts to suck him.

Kai’s finger slips in more easily than Julian would have thought. It’s a shock how arousing it is to have Kai’s digit inside. For long intimate seconds Julian trembles on the brink of coming until his orgasm rips him apart.

He has never come that hard before, has never felt the waves of his ecstasy so intensively. Julian shivers when Kai pulls out and snuggles closer against him, murmuring the first thing that comes up his mind while Kai holds him. "I want to sleep with you, babe."


	16. A mysterious call.

"Wait, what? Now?" Kai lifts the blanket and glimpses underneath. "I’m sorry but I might need some minutes to recover."

Julian smiles. "No, not now. Later. When… you’re… uhm… ready. When the time is right."

"We stick to our plan? Having the entire night together and so?" Kai asks.

"Of course we do." Julian already thinks about their walk, their bath, their closeness. A warm feeling of bliss flows though him.

"Next week?" Kai whispers into Julian’s ear. "I have even three days off then and so should you?"

"Yes. Yes I do." Julian wants to steal a kiss from Kai when Kai’s mobile suddenly beeps.

"Wait, I’ll switch it off," Kai murmurs but he flinches when he glimpses at the display.  
  
"Is it important? You can answer the call if you want to. I don’t mind."

Kai shakes his head, hastily typing a message. He smiles apologetically afterwards but Julian can clearly sense that something is troubling him.

"Is everything alright? Who tried to call you?"

Kai shrugs, taking a deep breath. "Not important," he tries to pretend.

"You can’t fool me," Julian says, kissing Kai’s neck.

Kai moans gently. "Don’t stop," he begs, "and forget about the damn call. I think I might be ready to go again."

"Really?" Julian asks, moving his hand underneath the blanket.

"Oh yes," Kai breathes and then, he doesn’t say anything anymore.

***

Julian falls asleep after they have both come in his hand. He dreams about their first time, about Kai all over him, naked and shining and gorgeous. He snuggles closer to Kai, holding him tight, but somehow, Kai slips out of his embrace and leaves the bed.

Needing some time to fully wake up, Julian realizes that Kai is indeed gone. He hears him in the living room nearby, talking to someone rather loudly.

Julian holds his breath but he can’t understand a word that Kai shouts into his mobile. He can only hear that Kai is agitated, that he talks a lot until he becomes quiet out of the blue. There are only a few words now and Julian can understand all of them.

"Yes."

"No."

"Alright."

"This is how we’ll do it."

Against his will, Julian’s heartbeat hammers in his chest. He knows by instinct that something is odd here. Did somebody find out about them? Is someone even blackmailing Kai? Or is there another, simpler reason for Kai’s call? Did he order a washing machine or something else for the flat?

When Kai returns, Julian feigns that he is still asleep, needing some time to sort things out. Should he talk to Kai about the mysterious call or not? He sighs deeply when he feels Kai’s body against his own and turns to the side.

"Are you awake, Sunshine?" Kai whispers with a tenderness that goes straight into Julian’s heart. "Can I hold you for a while?"

"Of course you can," Julian mumbles, sighing another time when Kai wraps his arms around him. He loves being spooned, loves feeling Kai against his back.

"Don’t ask, okay?" Kai whispers. "Just trust me."  
  
"I will," Julian replies, "as long as nobody is threatening you or doing you any harm."

Kai shakes his head and nuzzles Julian’s skin. "I’m fine, Jule."

"Just wait how fine you will be next week," Julian replies, wriggling his butt against Kai’s body.

"You’re still sure that you want it… uhm… this way first?" Kai tightens the grip around Julian’s waist, holding him in place.

"Oh yes," Julian replies, "just be gentle with me."

Kai swallows. "I will. Always, Sunshine.“

***

A few hours later, Kai has to leave. Julian looks out of the window when he’s gone, watching how Kai walks to his car - his mobile tightly pressed to his ear again.


	17. A burning desire.

Julian doesn’t see Kai during the next week. He doesn’t see him on Monday, he doesn’t see him on Tuesday and he doesn’t see him on Wednesday either.

At first, Julian isn’t concerned that Kai doesn’t come to their flat because he still has a Pokal match to play whereas Dortmund is already out of the competition.

Julian watches Kai’s Pokal match in their flat, astonished at Kai’s beauty and his skills. Kai scores, of course he does.

For a moment, it hurts Julian that Kai’s teammates celebrate with him. A year ago, Julian was still among them. Will they ever be able to play together in a team again, except for the national team matches? Julian sees that Kai is hugged by Lars and Sven and Kevin and Jonathan. He has to close his eyes to get himself together.

He has wanted this. He has wanted to join Dortmund.

Julian takes his mobile and texts Kai, congratulating him on his goal and the match, knowing that he wouldn’t get a reply soon.

Four days to go.

Four days until Julian would meet Kai, until they would finally be able to share the biggest intimacy possible.

Julian still thinks of Kai’s mysterious calls. That’s the main reason why he stays in their flat almost the entire time, just visiting his other flat in Dortmund to change his clothes. He doesn’t want to miss a single minute with Kai now, sensing that something is going on.

After every training session, Julian returns to their flat.

Yet, Kai is never there.

They message each other, with Kai explaining to him that he has a lot of training with two matches in one week. Julian understands that but he still feels lost.

His longing for Kai doesn’t get better while he continues to watch Leverkusen’s Pokal match. Kai is gorgeous with his long legs and his killer instinct in front of the goal. Julian can’t avert his eyes from him.

He stays in front of the television, even after the interviews with the players, just to watch the replay of the match. If he can’t have Kai right next to him, he wants to have as much of him as possible on the screen.

Julian watches the repetition of Kai’s goal, sees his precision and his shining glory, and his hand moves underneath his blanket, underneath his shorts and briefs. Slowly, he gets himself off, listening to the voice of the reporter who praises the skills of his boyfriend.

***

Kai doesn't show up in the flat the next day either. Julian can tell by the huge pile of dishes in the sink that Kai hasn’t been there. Kai would have probably cleaned them with a sigh, darting Julian an accusing look if he would have been here in the meantime.

If.

Julian throws himself onto their couch, grabbing his mobile.

_"How are you doing? Miss you",_ he writes to Kai.

_"Miss you too,"_ Kai answers immediately.

_"Can you come over?"_ Julian tries not to sound too desperate.

_"Sorry, I won’t make it,"_ Kai replies.

_"I see… Are you cheating on me?"_ The question is half a joke, half not.

_"Are you nuts?"_ Kai answers, still typing._ "With whom should I even cheat on you?"_

_"Marco?"_ Julian answers.

_"Don’t tell me that you’re jealous because of him too!"_ Kai adds another message. _"You’re a dork."_

_"At least I’m _your_ dork."_

_"Soon you will really be mine, Sunshine."_

_"I…."_ Julian types but he deletes it. _"Can we see each other before?"_

_"I don’t think so, I’m sorry. But in four days, I will wait for you in our flat until you come home from training."_

Julian pouts although Kai can’t see his disappointment._ "Alright,"_ he replies. _"Then we cook together?"_

_"Yes. And we’ll go for a walk."_

_"That sounds perfect,"_ Julian writes, now in a better mood. _"We’ll dance and we’ll have a bath together."_

_"And I’m going to make this night special for you, Sunshine. I promise."_

Julian smiles and puts his mobile to the side, not caring about calls or jealousy or bad vibes any longer.

Very soon, he will be in Kai’s arms and that’s all that matters.


	18. An overwhelming turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pure fluff and bliss - and I don’t regret a single word!

And then, the day is finally here.

Julian is not concentrated during the training session in the afternoon and Marco notices that after some minutes. "Are you okay, little one?" he asks Julian conspiratorially in a quiet moment.

"Yeah," Julian replies because he really cannot tell his captain that he’s probably going to lose his virginity tonight.

Marco doesn’t give up so easily though. "Any news about Kai?"

Julian stares at Marco in shock before he realizes that Marco hasn’t talked about his sex life. "No," he shrugs, "I avoid to ask him about that particular topic."

"I see," Marco answers, not satisfied.

To Julian’s bad luck, Mats joins them too. "Hey little one," he says, earning a snort from Julian because of the name, "are you okay?"

"No!" Julian shouts, "and I don’t have any news on Kai either!" He marches away, leaving two stunned teammates behind.

***

Julian showers quickly after the training session is finally over. He has received a message from Kai that he is already in their flat.

_"I’m on my way,"_ he messages Kai once he’s in his car. In the morning, Julian has decided for tight jeans, a simple t-shirt and a blue shirt open on top of it, hoping that Kai would find that outfit enticing.

Julian drives through Dortmund in his car, to the highway, his mind full of excitement and nervousness all at once. Will everything go as planned? Will he embarrass himself? Will Kai still like him afterwards?

Switching the music on as loud as possible, Julian heads towards his flat, towards Kai.

Heads towards a new life.

***

"Kai, I’m here!" Julian shouts, his heart beating in his chest, although Kai could probably hear him anyways.

"I’m in the kitchen!" Kai replies and Julian literally flies over to him, into his arms, into a fierce kiss.

"Missed you so much, babe," Julian gasps, kissing Kai another time.

"Missed you too," Kai replies, stroking Julian’s flanks.

Julian’s hands crawl underneath Kai’s black hoodie but Kai shakes his head. "Later, Sunshine. I cooked for us."

"Oh yes, I’m quite hungry," Julian states ambiguously, barely able to hide his joy about their reunion.

"I tried to cook pasta with scampi, knowing that you like it," Kai admits, pointing at a pot with boiling water. "Oh, and I did the dishes."

"Thank you," Julian replies touched, "how do I even deserve you."

"You’re a dork," Kai answers tenderly, ruffling Julian’s hair. "Without you and your idea of buying a flat for us, we would never be here. And now please try if the pasta is ready."

Julian takes a fork and fumbles a noodle out of the pot. Instead of eating it himself, he offers it to Kai. "You’re the master chief," he rasps, eyes never leaving Kai’s while he feeds him.

"They are a bit… _hard_," Kai swallows.

"Oh, are they?" Julian replies, wrapping his arms around Kai’s lean body. "You’re hard too, aren’t you," he whispers into his ear.

"Dinner first," Kai decides a bit out of breath.

Kai’s meal tastes delicious and Julian praises him with every bite that he takes. "I’ll even do the dishes," he promises. "Later. When we’re… uhm…"

"When we’re back from our walk?" Kai winks.

"Yes. Walk." Julian needs a moment to get himself together.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Kai points into the hallway before he stands up and grabs his shoes, his jacket, a scarf and a cap.

"You’re wrapped up like a gift," Julian admires him while he puts on some gloves.

"Maybe I _am_ a gift?" Kai says, eyes glued to his boyfriend. "Oh fuck, Jule, what are you doing."

“Pardon me?" For once Julian is sure that he’s innocent, wriggling his fingers so that they fit into the gloves.  
  
"Your fingers", Kai murmurs. "I have a thing for your fingers. Especially in these tight gloves."

Julian gazes at him perplexed before he stares at his hands.

"Never mind," Kai mutters, "I’m sorry."

"I’ll let you undress the gloves later," Julian whispers, "finger by finger. And then I let you feel my hands."

"Shit, Jule. We won’t even make it outside if you go on like this!" Kai starts to sweat.

Julian chuckles and opens the door. Although he really cannot wait to undress Kai he’s still a bit nervous, hoping that the cool air outside will help him to get a clear head.

Slowly, they walk through the streets, to the forest nearby, where Julian dares to take Kai’s hand. "It’s so peaceful here," Julian murmurs, tightening the grip around Kai’s hand. "I’m one lucky guy."

Quickly, Kai steals a kiss from Julian. "It’s the perfect night, Sunshine," Kai whispers, "I know it. Come on, let’s go back before we catch a cold."

Julian nods and inhales a deep breath. The clean air of the forest fills his lungs and he feels alive, so vivid and free. "Yes, babe. It’s time."

***

Once they are back in their flat, Kai switches some soft music on. Julian is in awe that he has prepared everything so thoroughly. "And now the gloves," Kai gasps, slowly undressing them finger by finger. "You have no idea how sexy that is, Jule."

Julian smiles and gets rid of his jacket and shoes. "Shall we dance?" he whispers, guiding Kai to their living room.

"Yes," Kai replies, kissing Julian deeply. They embrace each other, Kai’s hands around Julian’s shoulders, and start to move in sync to the music.

To Julian’s surprise it is arousing like hell to dance with Kai, to feel him so closely. "I want you so much," he whispers without thinking, hands resting at Kai’s butt.

"I want you too, Sunshine," Kai says, releasing his arms. He looks Julian into the eyes with a strange expression before he takes his hand and moves it to the zipper of his hoodie. "Undress me, Julian," Kai whispers.

Kai using his full name causes Julian’s stomach to flutter as he slowly pulls the zipper of the hoodie down, revealing Kai’s shirt. "You’re wearing yellow," Julian states hoarsely, "for me?"

"Yes, for you. My Sunshine," Kai whispers, eyes not leaving Julian’s.

Julian’s heartbeat paces up with every bit of Kai’s shirt that he reveals. He knows the colour, he knows the fabric because he feels it on his own skin at least once a week. "Are you wearing my jersey," Julian finally manages to say, his throat dry like sandpaper.

Kai’s answer however comes completely unexpected. "No, I’m not wearing yours," he replies. "I’m wearing mine.”

Julian’s heartbeat stutters in shock. "Wait… what?" he stammers. "How? I don’t understand?"

His body processes the news faster than his brain because his knees turn into something akin to jelly and he stumbles backwards, pulling the zipper of Kai’s hoodie down completely.

Like in slow-motion, Kai lets the hoodie fall to the ground, standing in front of Julian like an angel.

An angel wearing a black and yellow BVB jersey.

Julian shakes while he watches Kai turning around, showing Julian the name that is written on the back of the jersey. It’s Kai’s name. And it’s Kai’s number.

"Don’t play with me," Julian begs helplessly. "Don’t tease me like this, please. Where did you get that jersey from?"

"From Mister Watzke," Kai replies. "I will hold it into the camera when I sign my contract with Dortmund tomorrow."

The tears shoot into Julian’s eyes before he can say a single word. "Kai," he finally brings out, "Kai."

He feels that Kai takes him into his arms and holds him before they kiss each other time after time.

And finally, after all the eternity of keeping it inside, Julian says what he has wanted to say for a long time. "I love you, babe."


	19. A first time.

"I love you too, Sunshine," Kai whispers. "And I can’t wait to play together with you in the same team again."

"Kai… that’s just… I can’t." Julian still clings to Kai. "Why did you do that?"

"Why did I do what," Kai breathes against Julian’s rosy, stubbly cheeks.

"Sign with Dortmund. I can’t believe it."

"Oh come on, that’s easy," Kai replies playfully. "I don’t want to go to Bayern or abroad, not yet." Slowly, his hands wander underneath Julian’s shirt, pulling it over his head. "Then, there’s only one club left in Germany, a team where young players get enough time to develop." Kai moves his hands to Julian’s belt, opening it. "I can win a title here," Kai adds, stripping Julian’s pants down. "Oh, and as it happens, my boyfriend plays there." With one swift move of Kai’s hands, hooked underneath the waistband of Julian’s briefs, Julian is naked.

"Thank you," Julian brings out.

"For what? For stripping you bare?" Kai asks with a wink.

"No. Yes. I mean, thank you for coming to Dortmund."

"I want it, Jule. I really want it. And I want you." Kai opens the belt of his own jeans, getting rid of them together with his briefs. In the end, he only wears the black and yellow jersey, pulling it off tantalizingly slowly. "Bathroom?" Kai suggests.

Julian is not quite sure if they will even make it into the bathtub with him feeling so turned on, both from Kai’s revelation and from the sight that he gets. Kai all naked and flushed in front of him, ready to love him. "Yes, bathroom," he manages to say, his gaze still glued to Kai’s gorgeous body.

Kai takes Julian’s hand and pulls him with him, straight into the big bathroom with the large tub. "You bought candles!" Julian exclaims when he sees what Kai must have done a while ago.

"I said that I want to make this night special for you," Kai murmurs, taking a lighter. One by one, he lights all the candles.  
  
"Now that’s romantic," Julian whispers, stroking Kai’s back as he bends over the tub to let the water flow. Watching how Kai pours some fragrant foam bath into the water, Julian takes his hand again, intertwining their fingers. "I’ll never forget this night," he mumbles, waiting for Kai to kiss him.

After a wet and thorough kiss, Kai steps into the bathtub, sitting down and inviting Julian to join him. With a beating heart, Julian nestles against Kai’s chest. He hums in approval, the warm water, the fragrant scent and Kai’s closeness relaxing him. "That’s good," Julian breathes.  
  
"I’ll make it even better," Kai whispers into his ear and then, there are his fingers on Julian’s dick. "You feel amazing," Kai praises him, "so hard and sexy."

Kai finds all the right spots to stroke and to caress and Julian slides deeper into the water, closer against Kai’s skin. He knows that he will come soon, he only needs to think of Kai wearing the BVB jersey. But just when he’s about to lose it right here and then, Kai pulls his hand away.

"Come on. Bed, Sunshine," he says softly, reaching out for a towel nearby.

They dry each other off and once again, Julian almost comes when Kai runs the towel thoroughly over his dick and balls. He’s already on the edge, that much is sure.

The way to their bedroom is short and they both disappear under the blanket once they are there, the cold linen a pleasurable contrast to their heated bodies. Kai’s fingers return to Julian’s skin, he strokes his chest and his nipples, his abs and his thighs, before he suddenly stops. "More," Julian pants and Kai kisses him quickly.

"Just a second," Kai states, opening the drawer of their nightstand.

Julian knows what that means. He hears the sound of a bottle being opened, of a liquid being poured into Kai’s hands.

"Relax," Kai whispers before his hands move to that one special place.

It still feels odd to have Kai’s fingers there, Julian thinks, but he gets distracted when Kai kisses his way over his body, closer to his belly. After another heartbeat, Julian’s dick is fully enwrapped in Kai’s warm, wet mouth.

"Fuck, Kai, fuck," Julian pants, his dick disappearing in Kai’s mouth, just like Kai’s fingers disappear inside him.

Julian doesn’t know what to focus on. Kai’s tongue, licking him, or Kai’s finger, stroking… "Kai!" he screams all of a sudden when Kai touches something deep inside him, something that pushes his arousal to a new level.

"Found it," Kai murmurs against Julian’s dick, starting to suck him. Only his excitement and nervousness keep Julian from coming straight away. He senses that Kai tries to push in a second finger and breathes in sharply when Kai succeeds. "Are you okay?" Kai asks.

"Uhm… yes," Julian pants. "It’s just very… intense."

"Too intense?" Kai stills his fingers.

"No," Julian answers to his own surprise because he has never felt anything like this before.

Slowly, Kai pulls his fingers out. "Should we try it?" he asks, blushing.

"Of course," Julian murmurs, embracing Kai. They share a long kiss before Kai turns towards the nightstand again, getting the condoms. He opens the box and takes a condom out, trying to open it. "Do you need help?" Julian asks. Seeing that Kai is nervous too helps him somehow.

"Can you please… pull it over me?" Kai hands Julian the condom with shaking fingers.  
  
Carefully, Julian takes the condom and places it on Kai’s dick. He tries to roll it down but is too hesitant because he doesn’t want to hurt Kai. "Wait, I’ll help you," Kai murmurs. Together, they manage to put the condom in place.

"We’re a good team, aren’t we," Julian whispers, watching how Kai coats the condom with lube.

"Oh yes. And soon we will be reunited in one team," Kai adds.

Another warm wave of bliss rolls though Julian’s body and he lies onto his back, spreading his legs. "Come here, babe," he says, welcoming Kai with open arms.

It is a solemn, arousing and brand-new sensation to feel Kai on top of him, pressing him into the mattress. "Am I too heavy?" Kai asks but Julian shakes his head.  
  
"You’re perfect," Julian adds, fingers stroking through Kai’s thick hair. They kiss, long and passionately, until Kai shifts his weight. He takes his dick in one hand, searching for the right place.

"Almost," Julian gasps, reaching out to help Kai finding the spot. "Here, babe. Here." He holds his breath while he feels the tip of Kai’s dick, softest skin against softest skin.

"I don’t want to hurt you," Kai pants, "you’re tight, Sunshine."

"Don’t worry," Julian whispers, feeling the increasing pressure.

"Really?" Kai asks, pushing against Julian with more force.

"Yes. Yes, I… Kai!" Kai’s name sounds through the room, a room where time stands still for a brief moment.

The moment Kai makes Julian completely his.

"Julian!" Kai gasps in wonder.

Julian can’t reply, he can’t say anything, he can’t even make a single noise. He’s too occupied to feel. Kai all around him. On top of him. Inside him.

"Oh wow," Kai whispers, sliding in deeper. "That’s incredible." He kisses Julian, just briefly, because he has to pant for air.

"Kai." Julian finally manages to breathe out at least Kai’s name, overwhelmed and not daring to move. He’s too scared that everything could only be a dream, that he would wake up in an empty bed.

"Everything alright?" Kai slowly falls apart, that much Julian can tell.

"I can take it," Julian replies although he hasn’t been so sure about it when Kai has first pushed inside him. Now, he tries to keep his breaths deep and steady, failing whenever he realizes how close Kai is to him.

Propping himself up on his elbows, Kai tries to pull out and push back in, causing Julian to inhale a sharp breath.

"Shall I…stop?" Kai asks, gazing at Julian alarmed, his arms trembling.

"No," Julian murmurs, "but can we maybe change the position?" He turns to his side, hoping that he hasn’t ruined the mood. He can’t explain why he wants Kai to spoon him, it just feels right.

After a puzzled pause, Kai gets the hint and takes Julian into his arms from behind. "Of course," he whispers, kissing Julian’s face.

"I want to feel you again," Julian admits and god, how much does he want that.

This time, Kai finds the right place in an instant, pushing in gently.

"Oh yes," Julian sighs, curling himself up a bit.

"Show me how far I can go," Kai murmurs, reaching deeper. He holds Julian in his arms now, protecting him. Giving him everything that he has.

Instead of an answer, Julian moves closer to Kai, snuggling against him, taking him in. Slowly, he moves away again, just to let Kai push inside another time.

Entangling their fingers, they find a soft, gentle rhythm, and Julian relaxes into their motions. "That’s good," he moans. He closes his eyes and feels that Kai wraps an arm around him, touching his half-hard dick.

"I love you so much," Kai pants, neither keeping his hips nor his hand still.

"I love you too," Julian replies hoarsely, turning around to kiss Kai. Their moves become faster now, more urgent, and Julian knows that Kai will come soon. "It’s okay," he encourages him, feeling Kai’s warm and harsh breaths in his neck.

Kai holds Julian tight, presses him against his body as good as he is able to, and comes with a deep thrust and a loud moan. He pants heavily, hands stroking over Julian’s chest and belly rather unconsciously. Carefully, he pulls out, still gasping for air. "Sunshine…," Kai says, bending over Julian to kiss him. "Lay on your back and wait for a moment." With trembling hands, Kai fumbles the condom from his dick, ties a knot and throws it away.

Julian just looks at him, fascinated and more in love than ever.

Kai has slept with him.

He buries his hands in Kai’s hair and kisses him, letting out an indignant sound when Kai’s lips leave his. Kai however just moves lower, mouth never parting from Julian’s skin. Not until he’s close to his dick. Then, Kai glimpses upwards, before he takes Julian’s dick into his mouth, licking and sucking it.

Julian still feels so open that he doesn’t notice at first when Kai strokes him where he has been just minutes ago, carefully exploring that part of Julian’s body. Finding that special spot. Caressing it.

The orgasm starts at Julian’s feet, tingling its way upwards, spreading as a warm bubble through his groin. "I’m coming," Julian pants, half to warn Kai, half to find a way to express the incredible feeling inside him.

Kai’s finger draws circles, he’s slow but determined, in no hurry. It’s almost too much, Julian thinks, before the tension makes way for the best orgasm he has ever had. Kai strokes him throughout, breathing words of love and affection against Julian’s skin.

He has never felt so loved.

Julian is almost disappointed when Kai pulls his finger out, but he knows that he will still feel him there for hours, rather days. He couldn’t care less. Kai is his and he will come to Dortmund.

"Do you want to move in with me, babe?" Julian murmurs spent.

Kai chuckles softy, giving the only reasonable answer. "I already did that, Jule."


	20. A signed contract.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers,
> 
> here it is - the final chapter of this little story. I might come back to them and their adventures in and around their flat one day! Thank you for every hit, kudo and comment. Enjoy the fluff!

"Do you really know the direction? Once you pass the Sign ‚Dortmund‘ you have to turn left and…."

"Jule, I have a navigation system. And you already told me the way a dozen times. Are you sure that you don’t want to come with me?" Kai kisses Julian, the taste of their morning coffee still on his lips.

"I’m sure. I would be too nervous, I would probably ruin everything. You’re also the better penalty kicker. So I’ll wait here for you until you score." Julian feels every fibre of Kai’s body, his hands stroking him without any pause.

"And scoring means that I sign the contract?" Kai rasps into Julian’s ear.

"Oh yes," Julian replies, already getting hard again.

"I can feel you, Jule," Kai whispers.

"I know, babe. And I’m not even sorry."

Kai smiles. "Just wait until I’m back."

"What are we going to do then?" Julian is curious to hear the answer.

"I’ll let you have me, Sunshine."

Leaving a stunned, perplexed and very aroused Julian behind, Kai softly closes the door and is gone.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
In his mind, Julian creates the perfect time table. It would take Kai around an hour to arrive in Dortmund, park his car there, meet with Aki.

Another half an hour until everything is set and done, the signature, the pictures, the handshakes.

He’s quite sure that Aki will invite Kai for lunch then, so that will take another hour, maybe an hour and a half.

Driving back to their flat, one hour.

Four hours until Kai would be here again. As a BVB player.

His stomach fluttering, Julian just throws himself onto their couch, staring at the clock. He watches the clock hands crawling over the surface, each second and minute bringing him closer to his aim.

***

58 minutes later, Kai sends him a quick message. "I’m there."

Now, Julian is replaying the movie of his own signing in his head. The contract, the photographer, people smiling into cameras. He has been there before, he knows exactly what is happening.

Soon after the signature is dry, BVB will inform the public about Kai’s transfer. Julian knows that his mobile will explode then. He hasn’t told anybody about the news, wanting to savour the news alone at first.

Not able to sit down any longer, Julian wanders through their flat, to the room with his name on the door. There are still feathers all over and he smiles. They really should buy a hoover. And a washing machine. To distract himself, Julian opens a shopping website on his mobile and orders both.

They are getting domestic.

Julian grins when he confirms the order and out of a mood, he lets himself fall straight into his bed, surrounded by all the feathers that fly through the room now, high up in the air, like snow flakes or little fairies.

Then, Julian mobile starts to beep and doesn’t stop for a long, long time.

***

Kai calls him around an hour later from his car but both of them don’t find proper words. There’s nothing left to say anyway, Julian thinks. He still stares at the pictures of Kai wearing the official black and yellow dress, not caring about all the messages he has received.

Before Kai will become a part of the black and yellow family, before the fans will literally embrace him, it will be on Julian to see and to feel him first.

Tonight is about the two of them.

Julian walks over to the kitchen and starts to cook. The bottle of champagne is already in the fridge, waiting to be opened. He sets the table when his legs become wobbly all of a sudden.

Kai will come to Dortmund. They will play together again. They will live together.

They will love each other.

***

"Sunshine? Where are you? I am back!" Kai shouts when he opens the door.

Julian already knows that Kai has arrived, he has spent the last minutes standing at the window staring outside.

"I’m in the kitchen, babe," Julian replies.

"Did you cook for us?" Kai says incredulously.

"A special day, a special treatment." Julian tugs Kai into his embrace, brushing his dark strands away, just to kiss him with teeth and tongue. "Welcome to Dortmund, Kai," he whispers, kissing his boyfriend another time. He has prepared Pasta Scampi, the only food he’s able to cook.

"I love your pasta," Kai states, lifting the pot lid to inhale the scent of the sauce.

"And I love you," Julian answers. They kiss until the pasta is almost too soft, sitting down at the table afterwards. "How was it?" Julian asks. "I saw your picture everywhere. You looked hot."

Kai smiles, blowing some air over his noodles to cool them down. "It was perfect. My mobile didn’t stop beeping on my way home."

Julian sighs blissfully. He will never get used to Kai calling their flat his home. "Same here. But I didn’t answer any of the calls or messages. I switched my mobile off, to be honest."

"I did the same," Kai admits. "This evening is just about you and me, isn’t it?"

Julian nods, looking Kai into the eyes. "I have champagne in the fridge."

Kai takes another bite before he answers. "We should take the bottle over to the bedroom, don’t you think?"

"Yes, we should," Julian replies, offering Kai his hand and tugging him gently into the direction of their bedroom.

***

"You have a feather in your hair, Jule," Kai chuckles when he strokes Julian’s blond hair. "Here."

Julian blows the feather into the air and smiles. "I have bought a hoover and a washing machine," he states, pulling his shirt off. "And I think I should get rid of my clothes."

They kiss another time, Julian’s pants getting tighter with every lick of Kai’s tongue, especially when Kai loses off shirt too.

"I have to get this off as well," Kai adds, pointing at his trousers. Hastily, they both undress their pants before Julian straddles Kai again, their hard dicks meeting between them. "I want to feel you tonight, Jule," Kai whispers, "all of you."

"You’ll have me," Julian replies, standing up and nudging Kai down onto the mattress, "and I’ll be gentle, I promise. Just wait a minute." Julian goes to the kitchen to get the champagne and two glasses, returning to the bedroom. "Now or later?" he asks, lifting the bottle.

"Later," Kai replies, the bulge in his briefs giving the answer too.

"Okay," Julian says, placing the champagne and the glasses on the nightstand. To Kai’s obvious surprise, he leaves the room again, returning with the massage oil. "On your back," he orders, pouring the oil into his hands.

In the next minutes, Julian indulges every inch of Kai’s back with his hands, knowing how much Kai likes to feel them. He slides down his flanks, massages his shoulders, kisses his neck. "Can you do that more often," Kai sighs.

"Of course I can," Julian smiles, "and I can do some other stuff too. But you have to turn around first."

Tenderly, Julian removes Kai’s briefs bit by bit once he is laying on his back. Kai’s dick looks so gorgeous that Julian scraps his initial plan and touches it out of the blue. "Oh yes," Kai gasps, "more."

Julian’s fingers travel up and down Kai’s dick until he bends over him and makes good use of his tongue. Trying to bring Kai closer to coming, he pushes a finger inside, stunned about the tightness there. Julian moves his digit around until he finds what he has been searching for, stroking that special spot. When he feels that Kai won’t last very long anymore he pulls out and reaches for the nightstand, opening the box of condoms.

"Do you need help," Kai gasps, apparently still on the brink.

"Yes," Julian says, already struggling with the package.

He closes his eyes while Kai rolls the condom over him, desperately thinking of something else to not lose it. His misplaced passes. The last lactate test. Julian lets out a puff when the condom is finally in place without him ruining everything. Grabbing the lube, he moisturizes his dick, turning towards Kai. They haven’t talked about Kai’s preferences so far but as often, they don’t need any words. "Cover me," Kai begs, tugging Julian on top of him.

"I am heavy," Julian insists, trying to keep his weight off of Kai.

"You’re an idiot," Kai mumbles, "I like to feel you."

Julian kisses Kai, shifting his body into what feels like the right position to him. Unsure about what to do next, he takes his own dick into his hand.

"Let me help you," Kai whispers. They search for the right position together, shifting weights and limbs. It works better when Kai hooks his leg around Julian’s waist.

"That will do the trick," Julian whispers, feeling Kai against him. He pushes, trying desperately not to use too much force.

"It will," Kai moans.

Julian feels that Kai opens up for him, more and more, heavy pants hanging in the air. Just when Julian thinks that he cannot go further without hurting Kai, he’s inside. He gasps astonished because he would have never anticipated such an overwhelming feeling.  
  
Silkiness.

Warmth.

An incredible tightness.

"Kai. Love," Julian stammers. "Are you alright?" It’s an effort to bring out the words, to even say something, because his senses are overloaded with the feeling in his groin.

"Yes. Yes, I’m okay," Kai answers although Julian can hear the strained nuance in his voice.

"I know," Julian replies, thinking back to the day before, when he has made that experience for the very first time. Cautiously, he moves in deeper, stroking Kai and kissing him. Even more careful, he pulls out and pushes back in.

"Can’t believe how close you are," Kai pants, groaning when Julian tries another push.

At first, Kai doesn’t respond to the shallow thrusts, but he raises his hips after some time. "I love you," Julian whispers, aware that he won’t last for very much longer. It’s just too much. Kai coming to Dortmund, Kai underneath him, Kai all around him.

"Let go," Kai encourages Julian, stroking his back and holding him tight.

Julian comes with a strangled cry at Kai’s shoulder, the orgasm rolling over and through him, leaving an all-satisfying feeling of pure bliss behind.

Kai flinches when Julian pulls out. He’s flushed all over his body and Julian kisses him everywhere after he has disposed the condom, he kisses his "thank you" straight over Kai’s body until he reaches his dick.

It takes only a surprisingly short time until Kai comes in Julian’s mouth, hips shaking until he looks completely spent and blissed-out.

Julian crawls lower and swings his legs out of the bed. "You are not going to leave me, now, Julian?" Kai asks alarmed.

"No, babe," Julian says. "I’m just opening the champagne."

***

About an hour later, when the bottle of champagne is already empty, when there are many kisses traded, Julian clears his throat.

"I want to keep this flat here," he utters what is so important to him. "I mean, It’s not really close to Dortmund but it’s kind of our home and you can have an own flat in Dortmund or move in with me there, I just…"

"Julian," Kai silences him, placing his finger on Julian’s lips. "Of course we will keep the flat. Although I wouldn’t care where I live as long as you are there. My home is where my heart is. And my heart belongs to you."


End file.
